The Cost of Peace
by MusicallyBurned
Summary: Picks up during "Keep The Peace Part II" on the catwalk and follows the team and Greg's fight to survive. Told a lot from Ed's POV but jumps around a bit.
1. Chapter 1

"Boss?" Ed questioned warily as soon as he heard the first shot though his headset. With losing people close to him on his mind, Ed realized he was especially jumpy right now. They were so close to this being all over. Yes, he had lost Donna, but Clark would be okay. He couldn't even fathom the idea of losing Greg too.

"I'm taking fire, he's here, it's him." Ed could identify the tone in Parker's voice. It was laced with something he didn't usually hear. Fear.

Dropping everything else from his mind, he called the name he knew would follow him unquestionably, "Sam!" He knew as he started running that the fear in his own voice was showing. Ed ran against the tide of people, not even thinking about how ridiculous it was to be heading into a building containing a live bomb while others were evacuating. It wasn't the explosives that were beckoning him in, it was his best friend in danger. His best friend being shot at with no back up. His sergeant trying to stop a dirty bomb while the bomber tried to stop him. He heard through his headset louder shots, it was Parker returning fire. His heart was already pounding in his ears, his adrenaline working overtime. Sometimes the SRU headsets frustrated Ed, he could never get any privacy and Ed wasn't usually one to think to hard about his words in stressful situations. Right now, though, he was grateful. He could hear Parker's every move and Parker had to do nothing to get the information he needed. He heard his relatively frazzled voice coming though the headset asking, "Okay, Spike what do I do? What do I do?"

Ed had passed through the stream of evacuees and had made it to the stairs as he heard more gunfire ringing in his ears. In the headset he heard the sound that made his blood run cold, the unmistakeable 'Oof' of someone taking a bullet. Greg had been hit. Ed pushed himself further, his legs moving quickly, but not as quickly as his mind wanted them to. He heard Spike with the worry that they all carried calling to their leader, "Boss, are you there?" The empty air over the com felt like it lasted forever while he continued to run full speed through the building. Spike asked his question again and finally a response came through the mic. "Vest." He heard weakly. "Took it in the vest." Ed was running out of breath from sheer exhaustion. Hearing Greg sound as winded as he did allowed Ed to conclude that he probably broke a couple of ribs on the shot, but he had been able to answer and that was postive. Ed hoped he would get up and was rewarded with the sound of gunfire from Greg's end of the mic. Ed heard Greg's voice again, this time a little stronger, asking Spike what he should do now.

Ed listened to the reply from the bomb tech as he reached the third level of the stadium. He felt relief thinking he was nearly on the catwalk when he realized that Parker was on the other side of the building. He kept ascending the stairs and heard Greg give a reassuring 'okay', to the team. The temporary assurance didn't last as almost immediately Ed heard a shout of pain in his ear. "Boss." He whispered. A lump formed in Eddies throat at the sound of his friend in pain. He didn't know what to do other than press on through the empty stairwell as he heard Parker yell and release a hail of bullets toward the shooter. Ed heard the unmistakable sound of a body hitting the floor and then a rasping, gasping sound. His hair stood up and his stomach turned. Greg was injured badly. Ed knew he had taken another bullet, he didn't need to say anything. He couldn't find his voice anyway. He cursed the size of the stadium as he reached the catwalk level.

Ed didn't check to see that Sam was still behind him, knowing he was as fit as Ed and would be just as determined to get to their Sergeant. He knew Sam would have his back and be able to help him complete this mission.

He swallowed to suppress his own bodily response to the sounds his friend was making in his ear. When he spoke the bomber's name, "Marcus", Ed realized it was worse than he thought it could be. He sounded weak and his speech was thick. Ed suddenly remembered the reason they were there: the bomb. Greg needed to diffuse the bomb or else they were all going to die. Ed knew he wouldn't make it before the timer ran down, for their sake Greg needed to get to it and stop the detonation. This didn't cause Ed to pause, though, he knew that Greg would do anything to protect the team and those around the arena. Ed had to try to get to his friend. He knew he was making a dangerous choice blindly trusting that Greg still had the strength to diffuse the bomb, but he also knew he wouldn't be able to live with himself if he didn't do everything he could to save Parker.

Ed heard Greg calling out to the bomber; he realized he was trying to stall him. Ed wondered in horror what kind of shape his friend would be in. He must have lost his gun because the firing stopped. The words coming through his headset directed at the bomber now were semi-coherent. Ed listened and ran out to the open section above the arena floor, hearing his and Sam's boots echoing loudly in the empty stadium. He was almost there. _Just hold on, Greg_. He thought to himself. Finally Ed heard the words he was waiting for, "I just stopped your bomb." Ed sighed at that, at least the explosion wasn't going to kill them all. He heard Greg talking and noted the sound of his voice. Ed's heart sank to his feet but he pushed them forward, holding his focus on getting to his friend.

Finally, Ed could see his destination. He could make out someone walking down a pathway. He knew by body language and experience that it was not Greg. Looking nearby he couldn't see Greg standing, but he saw Marcus moving slowly towards his target, gun drawn. Direct threat and closing in. Without breaking his stride, Ed reached down and pulled out his gun, already wanting to fire but he wasn't close enough. He heard Sam's gun cock behind him. Ed longed for his Remy but it was too late now. He was armed only with the short range handgun he was carrying on his hip.

Ed could hear many breaths in his headset as the team listened in, but the one he was focused on scared him more than anything he had encountered in the field. Greg's shallow, gasping, breaths were rattling in his ear as he closed the space between them. He heard his friend speaking to Marcus, taunting him, "You're done." This time, Ed was close enough to hear in person the pain of Greg's intake of breath and the weakness in his voice brought pause to Ed, but he soldiered on. He was so close now. He could see Marcus in front of him, a red spot of blood seeping out of his shoulder. He realized Greg had got him at least once. His other arm was coming up though as Parker rambled on, his speech slurred and heavy. Ed was farther than he would have liked to be but he had to move now. Hoping that Greg wasn't close enough to take another bullet, Ed raised his gun and fired two shots, centre of mass. Marcus fell in front of him like a marionette with the strings cut.

As he fell the sight that was revealed behind the bomber would be forever etched in Ed's mind. The last steps felt like they took eternity even though Ed didn't hesitate as he stepped past the bomber's body to his friend. Ed's eyes bore into Greg as he sat semi-upright on the metal catwalk floor, blood having fallen from his mouth and down his chin. He coughed and pitched forward slightly looking weak and wounded. Ed's mind flooded with one thing, he was dying. Feeling tears form instantly in the corners of his eyes at the sight of Greg, he realized they'd been settled there since he heard his friend take the first bullet. There was blood everywhere. Ed went right to him, ignoring Marcus and ignoring the bomb. None of it was important, he had to get to Greg. He had to help him.


	2. Chapter 2

Ed dropped to his knees on the wiry and hard catwalk, reaching out to his friend quickly, needing to touch him, to show him physically that he was there. "You stay with me, buddy, buddy." He begged "You're alright." Ed completely focused on Parker not hearing as Sam said that the subject had been neutralized. It didn't matter, his whole world was here in front of him. His friend of more than twenty years was bleeding out right before his eyes. Ed placed a hand on Greg's clammy cheek and carefully pulled his SRU hat off, tossing it aside. He moved behind him to keep him up right and reassured him as he slid his hand under his arm and around his chest from the back, "Okay, I got ya." Ed saw more blood drip from the mouth of his boss, landing on the white of his uniform, the bright crimson standing out against the white word 'Police' emblazoned on his chest. He felt his own hand wet and warm. Looking down he saw a steady stream of blood rolling down over his own wrist and hand. He swallowed hard as the gravity of the situation continued to press into his mind. Ed heard Sam speak, calling for help and using words that he hated, "Officer down."

Ed only focused on trying to help his boss, his mentor, his friend. "You're gonna be okay." Ed assured. Panic welled inside of him as Greg's eyes dulled and Ed yelled helplessly, "Where's the medic?" He pulled Greg up so that he was leaning further onto his leg to support him. The movement caused Greg's eyes to widen in fear and pain. His body temporarily went rigid and then relaxed under Ed's arms which only caused Ed to want to shout out again for help. Sam, however, had also seen the change and Ed heard him yelling again for a medic. Not looking, Ed heard him taking off at a run going to get help, leaving Greg and Ed alone.

Ed tried to keep talking, to keep Greg focused on him. He could feel the breaths the man in his arms were taking getting shallower. Each time he took a breath in, Ed heard a cruel rasp in Greg's windpipe. He looked closer and saw more crimson escape Greg's lips. After Sam's outburst, Ed tried to comfort Greg again, to get him to relax, reassuring him, "Stay with me, I got ya." He knew if he was calm, it would be contagious, and that would be better for Greg.

They were both alerted to their headsets, still in their ears as a different voice rang through it. Dean had been at the SRU station and Ed realized he had been listening to everything. "Stay with us Dad, we're here." Ed wanted to shout to get Dean off line. He didn't want him to have to hear this. Ed knew Greg's protective streak for his son would extend to this. He wouldn't want him hearing his father in this situation. Ed didn't want to agitate Greg so he let it go. Ed needed to do something to help, to stop the bleeding. Fighting his panic to try and focus on what to do, he knew putting pressure on a wound would help. He slipped his arm under his friends, feeling the soaking wet side of his chest against his uniform. Pushing his forearm onto what he hoped was the source of the bleeding also helped him keep Greg upright and elevated. He leaned in and blinked to clear his vision so he could look into Greg's eyes only wishing he hadn't. The usually lively and soft brown eyes were filled with angst. Greg was scared and Ed knew he couldn't sugar coat anything. Greg would be able to read him, even in a situation like this. Just wanting to talk, needing to say something to break the silence, Ed started to ramble, "You did it buddy, you diffused the bomb." Pulling back he rested his cheek on Greg's forehead making contact and holding him close, trying to help reassure him. "You trying to put Spike out of a job?" He asked, attempting to be light and also helping Greg remember the others that loved him. His breathing changed and Ed used the hand on Greg's vest to shake him a little, trying to keep the sensation changing, keep Greg alert to the physical contact. "I got ya." Ed continued. Ed's heart broke as he saw Greg's features show panic and fear as he tried to breathe. "I got ya." He repeated, not knowing what else to say. Ed pulled Greg back a little further trying to do something, try anything to ease the breathing process. "They're on the way." As quickly as Ed blinked away the tears they continued to come, he wanted to wipe his running nose but couldn't take his hands of Greg. He sniffled, knowing the team would hear and looked up quickly to check for medics coming. He saw nothing and sighed, it felt like they had been there alone forever.

Looking back to his friend, he saw Greg starting to close his eyes, letting go. Ed wasn't going to let him give up without a fight. The medics had to be close and he shook him lightly as he called "Hey, hey." He kept his fingers moving on Greg's mid-section while he thought of the thing he had wanted to say for a long time. Something he could never seem to find the right time to say. The words 'now or never' floated mercilessly through his head. "You remember a couple years ago when I had to shoot Goran Tomacic?" Eddie had turned serious. He heard another ragged breath and willed him to just keep breathing_, 'Keep going, Greg. One after another.'_ He wasn't sure he could continue, his voice starting to fail as emotions rolled over him, "How you said to me 'Buddy, you might wanna do the math on all the 'I'm fine's.'" Ed became painfully aware of how still Greg had gotten but then, thankfully, he nodded ever so slightly. Greg turned his head to the sound of his voice, but he didn't know if he could see him or was even hearing what he was saying. He had to finish, "I've never said thank you." Ed's heart broke when a small smile crossed his friends' features. Greg pulled another ragged, uncontrolled breath and whispered hoarsely, "You're more than fine, buddy. More than fine." His voice was weak but his words pounded Ed like they had been screamed. He felt like his own body had stopped responding as he soaked in the compliment from his friend. Greg had leaned in, letting his head fall towards him. Ed moved toward the contact, landing Greg's cold forehead on his chin. Feeling more energy drain out of his boss's body put Ed on the verge of losing control entirely. He begged "Stay with me." He continued to push on his friends chest, trying to keep him feeling, trying to keep the awareness. Each breath Greg took became more and more shallow. He choked in air and a look of panic crossed his eyes.


	3. Chapter 3

**_A/N: If you've read this far, thanks! I'm just a fan that needed an outlet. I have been working on this for a long time, I just needed somewhere to vent and some closure on the awesome Flashpoint finale. Not much of a writer so I hope you can stand my ramblings. :) Please don't flame if it's terrible. It took me forever to get to the point of possibly sharing the story but I've got about 100 word document pages of this story sitting on my computer so I thought I'd see what happens if I shared some of it. :) Thanks!_**

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Ed had never held someone so important to him in his arms as they gasped their last breaths, he had never had it happen like this. Never someone he loved like a brother. "No you don't, no you don't." Ed wept openly. All sense of wanting to maintain control left him completely as raw emotion and grief poured out of him. "Stay here, we're not done." Ed leaned Greg back a little more and held him tighter in an effort to hold in the life in his arms, to keep him there. "We're not done." He pulled his friend close to his chest and leaned over him looking into his brown eyes that were now cloudy and unresponsive. Wrapping both his arms around him he begged, 'No you don't. Greg, don't leave me, you're not going anywhere." He saw Greg's arm had fallen backward and he reached out to try and put it back in place. Ed held him tightly, needing to do something but he was unable to stop what was happening in front of him. Ed would not let him go, he couldn't give up. "Greg, stay here," He sobbed, "stay here, you're staying here." Ed saw Greg's eyes close and tears fell fast and hot from his cheeks onto Greg's vest. He had stopped fighting, Ed felt stillness pass over Greg's body, he no longer held himself at all. Ed bowed his head and silence overwhelmed him, they were alone and Greg had given up. Ed needed help. He couldn't be gone. He shattered the heavy silence by screaming for help, his voice cracking "Medic, Medic!" He leaned over burying his head in Greg's shoulder heaving sobs while holding his best friend tightly, legs out underneath him, all sense of procedure and training forgotten. He was suddenly aware of the sounds in his earpiece, the sounds of pain echoing what he was going through. The sounds of grieving from his team.

"Ed!" The voice of Spike rang into his ear looking for answers. Ed didn't answer, he couldn't answer. He could not say what he was seeing. Still holding Greg's limp body close to him, Ed took one gasping breath after another while burying his head into Greg's vest, "No," he cried, "No, no, no." He pulled his head up looked into the face of his friend, shaking him slightly and waiting for a change, for some acknowledgement. When nothing happened, Ed leaned over again, dissolving into more uncontrolled sobs while clawing at his boss, holding him up and pulling him close. At some level, he hoped that getting him close to his live body would pass the life back to Greg. He would be willing to give some of his life, or all of his life, for Greg to come back to them.

Out of nowhere there was someone over him, "Ed, let him go." The medics had finally arrived. Steve was there with a medical bag and a team, "We'll help him." Tears streamed down Ed's face while he looked up at the medic, holding Greg tightly in his arms. Three of them were on scene along with Sam right behind him.

Arms still wrapped around Greg, Ed blurted out through his tears, "He's stopped breathing," He inhaled a choked breath and spoke to his friend, "Greg, you can't…" Ed again shook his boss trying to get a response. Steve crouched down and put an arm under Greg, helping lift him up, "Okay, let's lay him down, quickly, quickly." Ed pulled his legs up and got to his knees, watching Steve assess Greg. He heard another set of boots running and then a panicked voice, "No, Boss!" Spike had arrived and was going for Parker.

"Spike." Sam grabbed him roughly around the middle to stop him from getting in the way. "Stay here." Sam struggled to keep Spike where they stood, only steps away from where Greg lay unconscious.

"Boss! No, let me help." Spike pushed on Sam's arms to try and get away, clawing and shoving while his voice cracked. "Spike, Spike, you can't help." Sam reasoned. "The medics are here, it's their job." Tears fell freely from Spikes eyes as he struggled, but Sam wouldn't let go, "He can't be…"Spike stopped struggling and leaned into Sam, "They're gonna help, Spike," Sam said, tears welling in his eyes as well, "We have to stay out of the way." Sam got an arm around Spikes shoulder, keeping him upright and supporting his weight.

Steve had gotten to work on Parker, ripping his bag open and grabbing a stethoscope out of it, listening for any sounds to help. "No breath sounds, heart's stopped. Get the portable defibrillator set up." He commanded the other medics. Another chill ran through Ed as he realized what was going on. Steve leaned over and started pumping Greg's chest, "Come on!" Ed urged impatiently at the other medic who was pulling items out of his bag. "Greg, it's not over." Eddie sobbed over his friend. "We have to get the vest off of him." Steve said, pulling it apart in a rush while Ed tried to help, his hands shaking violently as he fumbled with the clasps that he'd fastened a million times on his own vest. Ed pulled it over Greg's head and threw it aside going quickly to Parker's uniform shirt while Steve grabbed gauze. Ed's hands felt like clubs while he tried to get the buttons undone on Parker's shirt. Steve turned back and shook his head slightly before pushing Ed's hands away and then ripping the shirt open, metal buttons flying everywhere.

Ed stared down at his friend, seeing first where the bullet had hit Parker in the vest just below his heart leaving a nasty welt and bruise. As he had thought many times, Ed was thankful for the invention of Kevlar. As they pulled his shirt further though, Ed saw the large gash in Greg's side where the last bullet had entered his chest under his arm, obviously damaging his lung and whatever else it came in contact with. His chest was covered in blood and Ed noticed the blood smeared over the ground, trailing to him. Ed was still staring at the hole in the side of his friend when Steve yelled, "Clear!" He had attached the pads for the defibrillator to Greg's exposed chest and right away shocked him.

"Come on, Boss." Eddie heard Spike's voice and he quickly looked up at him from his position on the floor. He saw Spike with red eyes and a tear-stained face held up by Sam who watched intently, his eyes glassy and reflecting light as well.

"Again." Steve commanded. "Clear." He pulled an oxygen mask and bag from the third medic and put it over Greg's nose and mouth, waiting for Greg to respond. When there was again no response, Steve glanced at Eddie who could only stare at his friend while air was pushed into his lungs for him. The sound of air escaping through the gash in his side wasn't lost on Ed. While he paused, Ed looked at Steve quickly, danger flashing in his reddened eyes.

"Again." Steve said, a hint of disbelief in his voice as he shocked Parker's chest again. He put his fingers on his neck and announced, "Got him."


	4. Chapter 4

**_A/N: Not a doctor, not medically trained. Don't flame me based on medical stuff please! :) _**

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_"Again." Steve said, a hint of disbelief in his voice as he shocked Parker's chest again. He put his fingers on his neck and announced, "Got him."_

"Thank God." Spike breathed, Sam absently patting him on the shoulder out of relief.

"Boss." Ed started, grabbing Greg's hand and squeezing. He felt no response and looked over to the other members of his team who stood together anxiously watching.

Steve pulled the pads off of Parker's chest and went to work. He reached across and grabbed Ed's hand roughly shoving it to Greg's side where the bullet had entered his chest. "Hand here, try and make a seal." He let go of Ed's hand and met his eyes briefly before instructing him further, "Watch him, if he stops breathing, tell me." Ed had his eyes firmly on Parker anyway, he wasn't planning on watching anything else. He could feel the quick breaths Parker was taking, his lungs struggling to expand. He adjusted his hand to try and keep the oxygen in.

"He took a bullet to the vest and another missed and hit his chest. Anywhere else?" Steve asked having a quick look over Greg.

"Leg." Spike piped up from nearby. He and Sam were at Parker's feet, it was plain to them. Steve moved and quickly assessed the leg wound. He could see immediately that it had hit in a very dangerous spot on the knee. While the bleeding was minimal and it was not an immediate threat, he knew right away that the injury would have long-lasting effects

"We need to get him out of here, now." Steve commanded. "Pass me the large roll of gauze." He told the medic that came with him. "We need to stop the bleeding and then get him to the hospital. We need to get him into surgery right away." The medic sprung to action with her phone attempting to call ahead to the hospital while the other passed a roll of gauze to Steve. Steve took it and looked at Ed, "Pull him up, I need to get something around this wound." Ed reached his free hand around and pulled Greg up by the shoulders, "Okay, buddy." He just wanted to say something, anything, "We're gonna get help. We're gonna get you out of this, I promise." As Ed pulled him up, Greg's head fell forward, chin resting on his chest. More blood spilled forward, crimson on the white of Greg's chest and also onto Steve's arm. Steve held a small piece of plastic to the chest wound and started to wrap the gauze all the way around Greg's chest.

"Oh god, boss." Spike closed his eyes, his knees weakening at the depth injury that had ravaged his mentor's body. Sam, his arm still on Spikes shoulder, reached down around Spike's back, preparing to hold up his teammate if necessary.

Steve nodded to Ed to let go as he finished wrapping Greg's chest. He tied it off and got his stethoscope to listen to him breathe. "Steve, what can we do?" Ed questioned. Steve put a finger up to silence him and then pulled his stethoscope back out of his ears. Continuing to work as he assessed, Steve summarized, "He's got at least one, probably two badly broken ribs on this side, plus major lung and chest cavity damage on that side. Sucking chest wound. The right lung is punctured completely and likely collapsed and the bullet is lodged somewhere in his body. Air is escaping and his brain isn't getting the oxygen it needs. That's the short version, but we need to get him down to an ambulance." Steve started stuffing tools haphazardly back in his bag as he talked.

Sam spoke, "We can't take him on a stretcher, it would take too long to get here and, the elevators are shut down because of the bomb, it's just stairs." Steve nodded. "We'll have to carry him out."

Ed was already moving to pull Greg to his feet, "Wait." Steve cautioned. "Let me just wrap his knee quickly. We can't afford to have him bleed out from there if something happens." Quickly running scissors up the leg of Parker's pants, Steve tried to quickly wrap gauze around Greg's knee. "Come on." Ed scolded. Steve bit back a retort, he knew what these two men meant to each other and their history as officers. Finishing in less than 15 seconds, he nodded at Ed who slipped his head under Greg's exposed arm and prepared to stand. Spike stepped forward, freeing himself from Sam and moved in to help. He crossed quickly to Greg's other side and threaded his head under Greg's other arm. Putting his hand up on Greg's shoulder, Eddie did the same and they lifted their wounded comrade together. Greg's head still hung dully forward and Spike looked toward Ed across Greg's shoulders. They locked eyes before Spike closed his in resolution and turned forward.

"Let's get moving." Steve encouraged, "Sam, help guide his leg, it's not the most life threatening injury, but we should be careful with it." Sam nodded and moved in to help the best he could. They started to walk back the way they came in, trying to move quickly but also not jostle the Boss too much. Steve was trailing with his medics, reaching forward frequently to check the pulse of the unconscious officer. He didn't like this situation, but he had to make a decision, they had to get Parker out of there.

"Let's go down and take a fire exit. I'll have an ambulance meet us and have a stretcher come part way." Steve instructed. There were stairs nearby and it would save them having to cross the whole venue to get out. Between the pair of them, Ed and Spike had no problem negotiating Parker's weight, even though he made no effort to help them. Ed was silent in his determination to get his friend out of this. He promised him he would get him out of this and he was going to follow through. Spike, on Parker's other arm, was focused on this situation as they hurried the man he lovingly called 'Boss' through the bowels of the stadium. He was Spike's mentor, his friend, and right next to his immediate family he most important person in his life.

The convoy made it to the stairs and Sam stepped forward, "I've got his legs." Sam went down a few stairs and reached back to pick up his Sergeant's legs, hitching them under his own arms. "Easy, easy." Eddie commanded, worried about his friend. As Greg was lifted off the ground, Steve stepped in again and checked his pulse. "How's he doing?" Spike asked hopefully. "Not good." Came Steve's grim reply.


	5. Chapter 5

"Let's move." Ed said. They started down the stairs, none of them caring that they each had to climb what felt like an infinite amount of stairs to reach Greg and now they would have to carry their fallen comrade down to safety.

Greg slowly regained feeling, but it was a feeling of motion first. Through his foggy mind he thought maybe he was on the elusive 'other side', but then he heard the voice of Eddie. He had to still be alive, unless something had happened to Ed too. Irrationally, he panicked, thinking something terrible had happened.

"Boss?" Spike noticed a change in Parker's body, in the hand that was draped over his shoulder that he was holding at the wrist. It was no longer as limp as it had been. One hand over Greg's shoulder, Spike moved the other to his chest, Spike looked down to try and see Parker's eyes, his head still dropped forward.

Parker heard Spike's voice too and wondered what had happened. He wanted to ask if they were okay but he had no movement, he couldn't even pull his head up. It felt like was just a stream of consciousness floating. He couldn't make his body do anything. Slowly though he started to become aware of parts of his body. He started to be able to feel pain, and sickness, the movement was making it all worse.

"Eddie." Greg muttered, barley forming the word. Ed stopped moving when he heard Greg say his name, his voice echoing over the halls like their steps.

"Greg?" He asked, tone serious as he dropped his head down to look at Greg. The convoy stopped along with Ed, Sam slowly putting his feet down and turning around to try and see. "He's waking up."

Steve stepped forward and put his hand once again on Greg's neck feeling for his pulse. "His heart is racing. His shock is getting worse. He needs and IV and he'll probably need to be intubated. I don't have what I need here for that." His tone was frustrated, after the long day they had all endured supplies were sparse for the paramedics.

The pressure of Steve's fingers on Greg's neck seemed to open up the flood gates of feeling. Suddenly he could feel everything, the pain in his body was unbearable. He lurched forward like he was going to be sick, Sam sticking a hand out from the stairs below in case the others couldn't keep a hold of him.

"Boss?" Spike asked again, face full of concern. "Can you hear us?"

"We've got you Greg," Ed continued, "We're getting you help. You hear me buddy?"

Greg heard the calls of his teammates, but couldn't process, the only thing he could feel for sure was pain.

"Sit him down." Steve instructed, not liking how much strength Greg had behind the first push forward. He worried that the shock was taking over and he wanted to reassess Greg if he was going to be conscious. As Ed and Spike moved to carefully place him down, but Greg moved forward again, gagging and pushing more blood out of his body. The pain in his chest intensified and the taste of copper was left in his mouth. He hardly opened his eyes feeling that even that effort was too much for him to handle.

Steve moved forward to check Greg again, he pulled his head back and shone a light in his eyes. "They need to get a stretcher in here." Steve ordered one of the other medics. "And make sure there is an ambulance waiting." The medic got on the radio again and Ed watched Steve waiting for him to finish his assessment of Greg. Once he pulled the stethoscope away from Greg's chest yet again, Ed started asking questions.

"What's going on?" Ed was holding onto Greg's shoulder, one leg up on the stair allowing Greg to lean on him to keep him upright. Ed could feel Greg shivering underneath his hand.

"Ed, the shock is getting worse. I need more supplies, he needs to get out of here." The medic that was on the radio came back. "They're outside the fire exit but they can't get in, inside only access."

Sam ran two big steps to the railing and leaned over. "We're almost there. Two more flights."

"Greg," Ed spoke, tears welling up again in fear, "We need to go. I know it's tough buddy, but we gotta get you out of here." Ed got back under Greg's arm and pulled him up, Spike joining him again. They pulled up and Greg cried out in pain. The sound echoed throughout the stairwell, causing it to linger. "Boss. It's gonna be okay." Spike tried, and failed to sound positive.

"Move." Steve prodded, "Now. There's no time, we have to hurry." Ed and Spike started forward faster than before. "He's sweating." Ed observed feeling the wetness on his back and also seeing his face glistening. "It's the shock." Steve answered.

"Eddie." Greg moaned. Ed wanted to help, "I'm right here Greg." Ed answered as they quickly moved. "No, bomb, hafta... get out. You're gonna, you can't..." Greg coughed and then groaned as more blood escaped his lips. "Boss, you diffused it, you did it." Spike told him. "Spike, mio figlio, mi fai così orgoglioso." Greg spoke weakly in Italian. Unable to stop himself, tears fell from Spike's eyes. "Get out." Greg slurred as a warning. His body tensed, "Have to get to safety, can't lose..." The voice trailed off but his lips continued to move, forming words that weren't heard. Ed closed his eyes slowly doing his best to keep his focus on getting out of there, not giving into his desire to stop, find a corner and cry. Shaking his head, he resolutely pressed on trying to tell himself that there was nothing else he could to other than this.

Reaching the bottom of the stairs, Sam slammed open the door and it crashed onto the outside wall. He looked side to side and yelled to his left, "Here!" He turned back to his team. "They're two doors down, coming over."

In the arms of Spike and Ed, Greg reacted to the sound of the door crashing. "Get down, he's here." His head was still flung forward, he coughed again and his body tensed, pain and fear washed over him. "Steve?" Ed demanded, fear creeping into his tone. "He's hallucinating, part of the shock." The medic answered calmly. Greg continued to mumble words of fear for his team, Ed only catching every couple but enough to know that Greg wanted to protect them.

They stepped Greg outside and Ed saw the medics running toward them with a backboard, but there was no ambulance in sight. Ed noted that one of their SRU trucks was behind the medics. He took a second, let Spike take Greg's weight and knelt down in front of his friend. He didn't know if he'd be able to see him but he wanted to help quell his fears. He pulled his gloves off, throwing them aside, and put his bare hands on Greg's clammy shoulders. Ed crouched in front of him quietly calling, "Greg." He put a hand up on Parker's cheek. "Eddie," he said weakly, faint smile crossing his features, "You gotta get out." Greg's eyes fluttered open, unfocused and he took a sharp breath before saying, "Take care of the team."


	6. Chapter 6

Ed moved his thumb over Greg's cheek, "We are out, Greg. I promise, you have to trust me. We're safe. And so are you, okay?" Ed asked. "I do trust you Eddie." He coughed again and pain crossed his features. Ed saw the SUV pull up while Greg finished weakly "Always."

"Get him on the board." Steve ordered. "Where's the bus?" One of the waiting medics answered, "They're all gone. This is the best we could do." The doors to the SUV opened and Jules and Leah both got out of the front, Jules still limping on her wounded leg. Sam stepped over and met her, but stopping her before she got to Greg. "You might want to wait, Jules." She looked at him, "I heard him talking on the coms, he's awake, it can't be that bad." Sam shook his head, "It's bad." He was trying to protect her from having to see Parker this way. He knew what that would do to her. "He needs to know I'm here." She pushed passed her husband and towards her team leader.

Behind the SUV, Steve was working on getting Greg onto the backboard that had been brought. Ed and Spike eased him down. "On his side, right side up." Steve instructed. "Tell me you at least got an IV for me." One of the new medics passed Steve an IV set up and a bag of fluids. Smoothly he plunged the needle into Greg's arm and found the vein he was looking for. He handed the bag to Ed telling him, "Hold it up. Let's get him out of here." He vaulted to his feet and reached back down to lift the board. Ed bent down with his free hand and Spike did the same. "One, two, three." Ed called as they lifted together and started toward the open back hatch of the SRU SUV.

Jules came around the corner just in time to see them lift Greg off the ground. She gasped at the sight of Parker covered in blood, his shirtless, bandaged chest and face almost totally crimson. Other parts of him looked grey and clammy covered with a heavy sheen of sweat. Sam was a step behind her and she stopped cold and stared for a second before turning away from Parker. She found Sam standing behind her and he looked down at his wife. She leaned into his chest, covering her eyes. He put his arms around her and leaned his cheek down to her head trying to comfort her but also steeling some comfort from having her in his arms.

Ed clambered into the SUV along with Greg while he still held the IV bag up. With the back seats folded down it was relatively roomy but far from ideal. Steve hopped in and pulled himself up even with Greg, putting a hand on his neck yet again to check his pulse. Another medic stepped foward and tossed in two more bags for Steve before Spike closed the back of the SUV. He looked up, taking a step toward the driver's side before seeing Sam with Jules. Sam looked up at Spike, knowing he should do the driving instead of Spike. They both loved the boss, but Sam was less emotional whereas Spike wore his heart on his sleeve.

"We have to go." He told Jules. He pulled away from her, looked into her eyes for a second and then turned toward the driver's side of the SUV. Spike turned to the other side heading quickly to the passenger door. He passed Leah who was tearful and silent. She went to Jules, "We'll tail them in that cruiser." She nodded toward an empty police car that was close by. The two of them hurried over, Leah getting behind the wheel.

Inside the SUV, Sam threw it in drive and stepped on the gas lurching both Ed and Steve forward in the back, Ed throwing his free hand out onto the back of Spike's seat. Sam held a look of grim determination as he flicked on the lights and sirens and focused on getting them the best route to the hospital. "Spike." Sam started to say, but the tech was already ahead of him, "Fastest route coming up." He had pulled a laptop off the floor and was already typing away accessing traffic cams and police reports as he spoke.

In the back of the vehicle, Ed found a coat hook to hang the IV line on and turned back to watch the medic working on Greg. "Greg, can you hear me?" Steve was trying to get Parker to react, "He's lost consciousness again." He shone his flashlight in Greg's eyes and shook his head. Ed, unsure what to do, remained silent hoping for some kind of instruction. Steve gave him just that, "Ed, knife." Ed pulled his tac knife out of his vest and handed it across to the medic. He quickly pulled up and cut the gauze around Parker's chest that he had applied earlier. Explaining, he told Ed, "I need to see this again, it looks like we're going to have to put a valve in." Steve was pulling at the remainder of the padding applied and finally got to the wound. Ed gripped the head rest in front of him seeing again the damage done to Greg. "I need to seal this off and insert a valve to relieve the pressure in his chest." Steve pulled the medical bag closer and pulled out a piece of tube and some tape. "Hold him still." Steve told Ed. Ed reached forward with one hand on Parker's shoulder and the other near his stomach, bracing him upright in addition to the straps on the board. Steve grabbed some plastic material out of the bag and stuck it to the wound, taping it in place. He then moved higher with the knife and positioned himself to make an incision. He paused and then pushed the knife into Parker's ribs. Ed felt his body tense under his hands. "Steve," Ed started to say something but as Steve plunged the tube into Parker's side, Parker let out a strained cry and his eyes shot open.

"Greg, I'm here. You hear me? I'm here."Ed reassured before turning on Steve "Give him something." Spike and Sam both called from the front of the SUV at the same time looking for answers at the sound of Greg in pain. Steve turned the valve and Ed heard the sound of air escaping. Ignoring Ed's demands, Steve only instructed him, "Ed, help me with the tape. He's punctured a lung in a few places, it's worse than I thought." Ed looked at Greg and saw his eyes were closed again. He looked even more pale. "Steve, what does that mean?" Ed was frustrated at not knowing the medical jargon and what the real issues were as he pulled pieces of medical tape off of the roll. "He's in bad shape. You just need to know that it doesn't look good." Ed shook his head, "How far out are we?" He snapped in the general direction of Sam and Spike. "We've got at least 5 minutes, maybe more." Spike answered. "Traffic's bad from the attacks." Ed cut him off, "I don't give a damn about traffic. We need to get there." Sam intervened, "We know, Ed. We're doing the best we can." Ed nodded, regretful of his harsh tone with his team. "I know that guys." He looked back to the medic who was at Greg's neck taking a pulse. He closed his eyes briefly and Ed saw the sign of defeat.


	7. Chapter 7

"What?" Ed asked, his stomach lurching. "We need to lay him down flat." Steve said going to work on the straps on the board. Ed went to work helping and Steve went for the bag that the other medics had tossed into the SUV before they left. "I'm losing his airway, there's too much blood." Ed finished the straps and moved back to Greg's head. "He's not breathing, Steve." Ed said, panic rising in his voice. "Lay him down flat, give him mouth to mouth, right now. Two breaths, check is his pulse." Steve commanded while digging supplies out of the bag at Greg's feet. Ed shook his head in disbelief and then carefully put his hand behind Greg's head and with his other he pulled at his shoulder, guiding him as gently as he could to his back. Ed took a deep breath to steady himself and then tilted Greg's head back gently. He plugged Greg's nose and leaned over, breathing into Greg's lungs for him. He felt pressure, like he was blowing into a contained space. "Steve, there's back pressure." Ed told him. "That's why I need to tube him, Ed." Steve said, while slamming things out of the bag in frustration, unable to find what he was looking for. "His airway's blocked. Carefully try and get some oxygen through. He's got a pulse?" Steve went to another medical bag and Ed turned back to Greg, placing a shaking hand on his neck. "Yes" Ed responded. "Keep trying." Steve called.

Ed felt his eyes tearing up again. He had to hold himself together. He bent down and breathed for Greg again. He felt a small amount of air getting through. He did it again and mercifully Steve arrived with the supplies.

"Turn coming." Sam said from the front as he squealed tires around the corner. Ed bumped his head on the window of the truck, "Dammit." He swore grabbing at his head.

"Ed, I need you here." Steve said. Ed pivoted back in line with Greg. "Hold his head steady." Again Ed carefully took Parker's forehead in one hand and chin in the other holding his mouth open. Steve had a laryngoscope ready to put down Greg's throat. Ed was suddenly very aware that they were hurdling down side roads at breakneck speeds to get to the hospital and Steve was going to attempt to intubate Greg in the back of this SUV.

Ed swallowed hard as Steve carefully inserted the tube into Greg's mouth. He pushed forward and started to bob his head to get a better angle, "I can't see, I've hit a blockage." The SUV hit a bump and Steve swore.

"Do we need to stop?" Sam called from the front of the car. "No!" Steve snapped. "We need to keep moving." He pulled the tube back out and to Ed's horror it was covered in blood. "Ed, you have a light?" Ed nodded but Spike turned around first with a full sized MagLite in his hand. "How's this?" He was smiling but his face quickly turned to fear at the sight of the men in the back of the truck. Steve held a bloody tube in one hand while Ed looked white as a ghost over the grey-blue tinged head of Parker.

"Great, Spike. Hold it up high." Spike did as he was instructed and Ed resumed his position holding Greg's head in place. Steve went to work again, putting the scope down Greg's throat. Spike's hand started to shake watching the scene unfold in front of him, but he reached up and steadied it with his other one, turning completely around in the front seat.

Steve hit a blockage and he felt the pressure stopping Parker from breathing. He applied some more pressure until slowly the tube moved again. He sighed in relief and pulled the scope back out leaving the tube. He tossed it on the ground quickly hooked the tube up to the ventilator bag and started squeezing, breathing for Greg. Ed had let go and Steve thanked Spike giving him the green light to turn around and resume helping Sam with the route.

"Ed, here." Steve rotated the bag around so that Ed had access. "Squeeze, count to 5, squeeze again. All the way." Ed nodded solemnly as Steve went back to the tube they had put in Greg's chest. Ed watched while Steve went and turned the trigger, air hissed out. "His right lung is severely damaged."

"What does that mean, Steve?" Ed demanded a second time. Before he could answer, though, the SUV came to a halt.

"We're here." Sam stated, jumping out of the vehicle, Spike doing the same on his side. Steve quickly fastened Greg back to the board and was ready by the time Spike wrenched the hatch of the SUV open. They both reached in and after a nod from Steve, started pulling Greg out. They both had one side of the orange handles that held Greg up, Ed following, sliding off the edge and staying level, continuing to administer air to his sergeant while holding the IV bag that gave him fluids. Jules and Leah both arrived and each took a handle as well, the caravan moving quickly toward the entry way to emergency, each having a hand in carrying their fallen leader.

They barged through the doors to emergency and Steve went right to reception, "This man is priority one, should have been called in." Behind the desk the nurse looked around the room as Team One followed her gaze. All of the injured standing and sitting and lying on stretchers, bloody, semi-conscious, crying around them. Most of them transferred from the stadium. Saved by Greg Parker.

"We got a call but we're packed, sir. The attacks today, we have a lot of wounded and injured. We can triage him, but..." She looked at the state of Greg, the amount of blood and tubing, that he wasn't breathing on his own, he was unconscious, unstable, being kept alive by those with him, and obviously going to require a lot of time. "He'd be a black tag."

Ed jumped on the nurses words, "Black tag! This man is the reason these people are still alive!" Ed yelled, losing his temper to his worry and exhaustion, waving his hands over the waiting room. "He diffused the bomb at the stadium, the bomber that set this all up shot him and would have finished the job if..." Ed stopped mid-sentence, not realizing what he was saying. The waiting room went silent as Ed stormed at the nurse.

Steve jumped in to defend the team, "This is Strategic Response Unit Team One. If it wasn't for them, at least 4 more bombs would have gone off today but they single handedly found and diffused them. You can not let their team leader die here in the entrance to the hospital. I know what he needs, just get me one doctor and some supplies."

Behind the team, citizens were watching and listening. A man nearby stood up carefully and looked at Parker. "Hey, this was the guy on the news." He said, recognizing Parker from the speech he gave to the city. Patients nearby craned to have a better look. "People were taking about how what he said saved lives. He can take my spot." The man was obviously injured, his leg was broken and he was covered in blood and dust.

Another woman stood up, she had a head wound and was holding a dirty towel to her forehead. Looking at Greg she encouraged, "He can go ahead of me, too."

An elderly man spoke from his chair, "I was still at the stadium when the bomb was there. I heard some police saying it was diffused. He saved my life, he can have my spot." A murmur overtook the waiting room. People looked over Team One and their fallen leader, in support, someone started to clap. Then another. Soon, the whole waiting room had broken into applause. People laying on gurneys were clapping, urging them to take Parker in.

A doctor followed a gurney out of a nearby trauma room as it went toward another section of the hospital. He came to the desk, seeing what was going on. He took one look at the situation, at Parker on the backboard and the team holding him, upset and anxious, standing with Steve the paramedic and then waved them forward. The group started walking with Greg still on the backboard, Ed still breathing for him, into the trauma room.

As they turned the corner, Jules stopped, turned back and, wiping her tears with one hand, waved at the crowd. As they got quieter, she let as loud of a "Thank you" go that she could muster. She went to join her team and her Sergeant.


	8. Chapter 8

The team hustled Greg into the exam room and the doctor pulled a freshly dressed gurney from the corner. The team carefully laid Greg down on top of it and a nurse brought an IV pole so she could take the IV bag from Ed. Steve went to work unstrapping Greg from the board and Spike reached over and helped. Ed was still pressing the bag, breathing for his friend at regular intervals.

"Okay, let's move him." The doctor said. "Toward me on three." He counted and the team prepared themselves, Spike at Greg's head and the others at intervals down his body. They carefully pulled him forward and Steve pulled the board out, discarding it nearby. They laid him gently down and Steve started to talk. "Gunshot wound to the right chest, no exit wound. Cardioverted in the field. LOC intermittent times 15, valve inserted and intubated in the field. Vitals are low, no BP taken but last heart rate was close to 160, suspect broken ribs from shot to the vest, collapsed right lung. Also, GSW to the left knee. Not attended." The doctor looked at the nurse, "Call surgery right now, we need to red line him up if they can take him." The nurse turned to the phone and Ed turned into his normal self "IF they can take him?" "Ed." Sam warned, stepping toward him as he continued to pump the bag breathing for Greg. "Fine, fine, I'm fine." Ed used his free hand to wave Sam off. Ed knew his emotions were getting the best of him, he was nearing the end of his emotional rope. He sighed and said nothing more as the doctor scurried to hook Greg up to monitors and additional IV's.

Once he was hooked up to the heart and blood pressure monitors, Steve winced and looked at the doctor. "He needs to go up, now." The doctor nodded as the nurse hung up the phone. She gave him 2 fingers indicating that surgery just needed a couple of minutes. Steve sighed and rolled his eyes. Seeing the numbers on the monitors, Steve was even more concerned. They were lucky to get Parker this far, he didn't want any more delays.

The doctor had added saline and morphine both in high doses to Parker. It started to take effect almost immediately and Greg started to be aware of parts of his body. Slowly he rose out of the haze and as much as he felt pain, he wanted consciousness. He wanted to push forward. As he regained parts of feeling, he also was aware of a strange sensation, his chest rising and falling without his assistance. Also there was someone prodding him, touching his chest, then his knee. He felt nauseas and tried to open his eyes.

"Greg." He heard his name spoken softly by a voice he knew so well. He forced one eye open and was rewarded with a sight he knew well as well. Comfort washed over him as he saw Eddie. Also, the mystery of the feeling in his chest was solved. Eddie was standing over him pushing a bag to breathe for him.

"Greg, we got ya, you're at the hospital. They're going to get you into surgery. You're gonna be fine. Can you hear me?" Parker closed his eyes and opened them again in an attempt to acknowledge his TL. "Hold on, okay buddy?" Even though the morphine was circulating, Greg's injuries were pushing past, he winced as he felt his chest sear.

Greg heard a voice he didn't recognize saying something about going up. "They're gonna take you up to surgery now, Greg. We'll be here when you get back, okay? We're all waiting for you." Greg slowly lifted his left hand ever so slightly looking for some comfort from his friend. Ed reached down and took it, locking hands at the thumb. Greg noticed a tear in the corner of his eye as well as blood on Eddie's cheek and forehead. Greg realized how bad he must look, how sick he must be, was that his blood? He didn't remember much about how he ended up where he was, but he remembered Ed, the comfort of him nearby. Now, though, Ed's emotion worried him. Ed was normally either composed or angry. Rarely did he show emotion like this. Greg closed his eyes again for a second, but as he opened them, he felt another hand placed on his arm. He looked to Ed and saw Spike next to him. Parker met eyes with the young tech and Spike nodded, "We're waiting for you boss." Greg noticed his voice was thick with emotion and his red eyes gave away that he'd been crying. Another silhouette appeared next to Ed, Sam's blonde head swam into view, Jules at his arm with tears in her eyes. "Boss," Sam started, "Proud to be here with you." His voice cracked slightly, but Greg locked eyes with him and then his secondary, Jules. Leah stepped up on the other side and added a hand to Greg's arm, nodding at him with encouragement. Greg was so proud to see them all standing there, tears formed at the corner of his eyes and the first one fell followed by another. Ed nodded, squeezed his hand harder and said, "We'll be waiting." The nurse stepped forward and took over for Ed administering oxygen. The team took it as their cue to step back and let their leader be taken. "We're right here." Ed reiterated as they started to push Greg's gurney away.

Team One stood in silence as they watched their leader wheeled out of the room, Jules sniffling at Sam's arm. Eddie wiped his eyes and his forehead and caught a glimpse of his hands as they came down. He paused looked at his hands, opening them and turning them over again and again looking at the blood and dirt that rested on them.

"Ed?" Spike asked, seeing their Team Leader's reaction. They had all been covered in someone else's blood before, it was just part of life with the SRU. It was different now.

"Ed," Jules spoke up, reading his state of mind. "He's gonna pull through. He has to." Ed wheeled around and walked away from his team, feeling that the air in the room was too close, too tight, compressing him and not allowing him to breathe.

Without saying a word he turned and left the room. He made his way back to the entrance of the ER and out the door. He stood tall, hands on his hips sucking the fresh early evening air in with his eyes closed. Ed tried to calm himself, calm his thoughts, but to no avail. His mind kept racing and his stomach kept rolling. He didn't hear the door open behind him, only the thoughts in his mind, the spinning inside his head. Flashes of Greg on the ground bleeding, the fear in his eyes as he looked to him for help, help that he couldn't give. Holding him in panic, sheer terror washing over him as Greg stilled. The blood, the fear, the team's reactions, the sound of his breath, the smile Greg gave Ed before he passed out and those words of reassurance. Those damn words while the world crumbled around them. Ed's vision started to spin faster and he took two steps further from the ER entrance before bringing up the contents of his stomach in a decorative bush. He spat the taste out of his mouth and gulped in more air trying to calm his nerves and his stomach as well as stop his brain from continuing in overdrive. Leaning over with his hands on his knees and wondering if he was finished, he heard someone deliberately shuffle behind him. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, only to taste blood which caused his stomach to churn again. He turned to look and Sam stood behind him, looking down at the pavement waiting for Ed to compose himself.

Ed stood and started to move, treading small circles as he put the back of his hand back in front of his closed mouth trying to steady himself. "Ed." Sam laid a hand on Ed's shoulder stopping him. Ed closed his eyes and pulled his hand away from his mouth. "We can't lose him, Sam." He paused, "I can't lose him." Ed's eyes clouded again, and his stomach protested at the thought. Sam squeezed his shoulder. "I know, Ed. We got him here, he's got a good chance." Sam paused and looked at his Team Leader. Ed looked up and met his eyes. Sam gave an almost imperceptible nod and Sam pulled him forward into a quick, backslapping hug. He rolled off of Ed and let him go first back into the ER, placing his hand on his shoulder from behind.

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_**A/N: Thanks for reading, feel free to review. :) **_


	9. Chapter 9

_**A/N: Not a lot of reviews, that's okay if people aren't enjoying it. I'm going to keep posting anyway for a while, I guess.**_

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Inside the ER, the team watched Ed leave them, unsure of what to do. Sam moved first to follow their TL out, hoping that he would talk to him. Spike, Jules, Leah and Steve were left standing in the empty, eerily quiet, ER trauma room. "Steve," Jules started, "How is he?" Steve closed his eyes for a second, not really wanting to answer that question. Jules hadn't been in the truck, hadn't seen how bad it really was on the catwalk. She hadn't seen their arrival, seeing Ed in pieces on the ground holding the bloodied, beaten and dying Greg in his arms. But she knew he was gravely injured. He couldn't lie. "He's got a chance." Steve said, trying to sound positive.

"How much of a chance?" Leah asked.

"It's really hard to say. It depends what they find in surgery, how bad the chest wound really is and what the bullet hit. If it was a clean lung hit, then his odds are probably 60-40 to make it. If it's worse, did more damage, it's really impossible to tell." Steve hated giving odds, but he knew this team was not going to take anything but the truth from him. "But that's only if they can stabilize him. That much blood loss and damage, they may not be able to get him stable at all." The odds hung over the team thickly in the silence. Best case, 60-40. Worst case, worse than that. Jules stubbornly wiped a tear from her eye before taking Spike by the arm.

"We should go up and wait for him to come out of surgery." She stepped in the direction Greg had gone. "I have to get back out there, there's still lots of work for me to do." Steve said. "I'll check in when I can." He turned to leave and saw Sam and Ed coming his way. He nodded to them and Ed, realizing he was leaving, started to speak. "Thank you, Steve." He said. "Thank you for everything." Steve gave Ed a half smile and shook his hand, "Keep me posted." Steve asked. Ed agreed and Steve shook Sam's hand on the way by him as well.

Ed and Sam followed the rest of the team towards the elevators, Leah offered to go and move the vehicles out of the loading zone before they got in and got comfortable. They checked the directory and found the floor that surgery was on, heading up. They unloaded and found the surgical waiting room. It was mercifully empty and stood fishbowl like in the surgery area, near the doors to the operating rooms. Ed went over to the nurses' station nearby to make sure that Parker had been admitted and there were no hold ups. "He was lucky." The nurse said, "Our best surgeon was just freed up so they were ready to take him right in."

"Lucky." Ed repeated absently thinking that nothing about this situation was lucky for Greg. "Sure." He said quietly. Ed drummed his fingers on the desk for a few seconds before asking the woman, "Can you check on another patient here? My son was brought in from City Hall." The woman nodded, "I can give you a room number if he hasn't been discharged" Ed nodded, "Clark Lane." In a few keystrokes on her computer, she raised her eyebrows, "He's actually just down the hall." She gave Ed quick directions and he thanked her before returning to the team.

Jules and Sam sat side by side in the waiting room looking grim. Sam had pulled over a hospital green and wood chair for Jules to put her leg up on. The room was small with chairs around the square perimeter, horizontal blinds on the windows open so they could see out. Spike wandered aimlessly around the waiting room near a wood end table far from Sam and Jules, too restless and agitated to sit. Ed wandered in and told them, "Guys, Clark is close by, I'm gonna go check on him. I'll be right back." Sam and Jules nodded, Spike, however said nothing, lost in his own thoughts. Ed turned to leave but Sam called out to him, "Ed, you need to clean up before you see Clark." Ed nodded but then realized, "I can't, I can't do anything. SIU." He simply stated, remembering just now that there was police procedure involved. All of that seemed so unimportant after the emotion of the day. "Ed, you need to go back to the station." Jules said, "SIU is going to be looking for you." Ed shook his head. "I'm not leaving. I don't care." Jules started to argue, "Yes, you do, Ed. Sarge wouldn't want you in trouble over him. You know he'd want you to follow protocol." Ed sighed with defeat knowing she was right. He was in an impossible situation. He wanted to see his son, he wanted to stay with his friend and sergeant. But he faced a world of trouble if he did anything before he was debriefed by SIU, and he didn't want Clark to see him in his current state. It would be a quick interview, open and shut. The man he killed had already killed numerous people including other SRU officers. He had grievously wounded his sergeant and was about to kill him when Ed shot him. It seemed so stupid to have to go back to the barn for that, but he faced the possibility of legal action if he didn't dot all his i's and cross his t's. It would all have to wait. He nodded to his team. "Ok, I'll head into the station." He pointed at Sam, "Keep me posted. Anything you hear, I don't care how small. I mean it." Sam nodded.

Ed turned and headed back to the elevator hoping that he would run into Leah on the way out to get some keys from her but instead of her, as the elevator beeped to the floor, Commander Holleran was standing there waiting for it to open up. He was accompanied by an SIU member that Ed vaguely recognized as Mike. Shocked, Ed stood there as Holleran came off of the elevator. "How is he?" Holleran asked, making no effort to hide his worry which increased at the sight of Ed covered from nearly head to toe in blood.

Ed shook his head. "Not good, but they got him into surgery. We just have to wait now." Thankfully, Holleran didn't ask Ed for any more details. "How about Clark?" The commander asked. Ed shook his head. "I haven't been to see him, I was just coming back to the station to see you guys first so I could clean up."

"Okay," Holleran answered, "That's why we're here. I want to do your team's debrief here." Ed nodded, "Let's get it done then." He was grateful that he wouldn't have to drive all the way back to the station, for once, he really appreciated Holleran's decision. The commander walked away over to the same desk Ed had enquired at minutes ago. The SIU officer introduced himself to Ed as Michael MacLauchlan, told him to call him Mike and asked if he needed a lawyer. Ed shook his head, "Fast is good." Ed answered. Holleran returned less than a minute later with a set of dark blue scrubs and a place for them to meet. "We can use the staff lounge on this floor." Holleran explained and started to walk, Ed and MacLauchlan following him.


	10. Chapter 10

Once they entered the room, Ed started to pull his clothes off, as he had done many times before in situations like this. This time, however, it carried a much more personal feeling. He was suddenly very aware about how much of Greg's blood was on him, how damp his clothes were. Starting with his shoes he methodically got undressed, then pants which were pooled at the knees and also on his thighs where Greg had rested. As he pulled off his vest he noticed that it felt heavier. Moving to his shirt, Ed's hands started to shake as he attempted to push the buttons through the holes. They were slick and his hands started to sweat as visions of Greg came back to him. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "You okay Ed?" Holleran was asking. His head started to swim again, "Yeah, yeah." He said, dropping onto a chair next to a table in the lounge. He sat forward and ran his hands over his head before sitting up again and finishing the job of getting his shirt off. Holleran couldn't help but notice that Ed had red markings from his wrists to nearly his elbows still, having soaked through the layers of his shirt. Also, the undershirt he wore was not entirely white either.

"Keep going, Ed." Ed looked down and sighed, pulling off his undershirt and throwing it in the bag as well. It wasn't evidence, but he didn't want it. Holleran gave Ed the scrubs and he pulled them over his head, now shoeless but dressed.

"Ed, I know this is hard on you. We're going to make it quick." Mike explained. Ed was grateful, he just wanted to go see his son and go back to his team. "Holleran has already explained the pertinent information, just summarize it in your own words, starting with a little bit of background on the subject and up to the incident being resolved..."

Ed started to talk, in the usual way he did these debriefings, he kept his emotion out of it, using terms like 'Subject'' helped him make it through. After giving some background on Faber, his mindset and the other bombs. Mike did most of the questioning and did a good job of leading Ed near but not directly to the bomb that killed Donna. Ed wasn't part of that in SIU's eyes, he wasn't near it and it didn't affect his choices.

"Describe what happened at the stadium." Mike was patient and asked with a tone of concern. Ed sighed. "We evacuated because Parker realized that his final target was going to be the stadium. He read the subject from the videos and knew, I don't know how, but he did. Callaghan, Braddock, Leah and I were there and Scarlatti was on the way. We were helping evac while Parker looked for the bomb. He didn't want anyone else inside just in case. He was confident he could find it and he did. We had narrowed it down to somewhere high up for maximum damage. When he started taking fire, though, we breached the building and went to get the bomb disarmed."

"At that point was your intent to neutralize the subject?" Mike asked.

Ed shook his head. "No. Talk first. Parker was trying to talk to the subject but we could hear him firing back."

"When did the objective change to neutralize?" Mike asked.

Ed paused remembering Greg in the headset trying to disarm the bomb while he was taking fire. "After Parker was hit. We could hear in his comm that he was trying to talk to the subject but we could hear..." Ed trailed off, closing his eyes. It was so fresh in his mind still, images he was trying to get rid of, but here they were again. He sighed and pressed on, his eyes still closed. "We could hear Parker take a shot off the vest. After the subject continued firing at that point, and then when Parker was hit again it became obvious directed threat. We had to neutralize the subject to stop the bomb from going off and killing everyone in and around the stadium."

"And Greg Parker." Mike finished. Ed nodded, opening his eyes again. "Parker was unsuccessful in negotiating the subject, correct?"

"If Greg couldn't negotiate him, no one could. He had a handle on the subject, but he wasn't going to be talked down. This day was a result of some brutal, sadistic psychological torture masked as experiments. He was bent on revenge and wasn't going to stop until his manifesto was completed." Mike nodded. "Continue please."

Ed continued narrating, "Braddock and I were on the catwalk, we saw the subject raising weapon and closing in on Parker. We could hear that Parker wasn't able to bring him down. He was a direct threat to an officer. Once the gun came up I neutralized the subject. Double tap and he went down."

"Did you have a visual on your sergeant at that time?" Mike asked. Ed shook his head, "No, the decision had to be made visually blind, but we could hear him." This brought pause to Ed. The realization again of how close they came to losing Greg, how close they still were to losing him, was brimming to the surface of his consciousness once more. He tried to suppress it, to deal with it later. He had to get through this first. His vision hazed as he was lost in his thoughts, squeezing his knees with his hands he tried to keep his feelings at bay. The voice of Holleran brought him back to this room.

"Okay, Ed. I know this has been a tough day for you and your team. You can go. We're going to want to see the rest of your team, just to be safe for the investigation." Ed didn't like it but knew that there would be plenty of legal wrangling after a day like today. Ed stood up and Mike just said one more thing, "Photos." He motioned to Ed.

"What?" Ed asked. He was already setting his mind to leave, he wanted to go see Clark.

"Subject's blood." Mike answered. Ed shook his head. "None if it's the subjects. I wasn't close enough for any of his to get on me when he was hit." Ed responded. "Braddock cleared him while I..." Ed didn't finish. "

Holleran piped up, "It's all Parker's?" His tone disbelieving while looking Ed over again. Ed felt his stomach lurch again as he nodded. "Yes sir." Ed said.

"You're sure." Mike checked.

"Absolutely" Ed responded. "Absolutely."


	11. Chapter 11

_Holleran piped up, "It's all Parker's?" His tone disbelieving while looking Ed over again. Ed felt his stomach lurch again as he nodded. "Yes sir." Ed said. _

_"You're sure." Mike checked._

_"Absolutely" Ed responded. "Absolutely."_

Ed grabbed his phone off the table and headed for the door. He made a beeline back down the hall and to a washroom he'd seen earlier. Heading in and going to the sink, Ed checked himself in the mirror. He was surprised to see his reflection, how dirty, tired and generally awful he looked. Ed pulled his scrub shirt back off so he could properly clean up his arms and hands and also his face. He was horrified to see the amount of red that was in various places on his head, cheeks, chin and even his ear. He roughly grabbed some paper towel, turned on the hot water and went to work trying to clean himself up.

Ed walked out of the washroom 10 minutes later looking better but feeling worse. He headed down the hall to see Clark but his mind was in two other places, first with Parker and second with Donna. The reality that she was gone was starting to hit home with him now that he had time to process. He had been compulsively checking his phone for an update from the team on Parker. He also knew that by now, Donna's husband would be informed of her sacrifice and he would be grieving. He made a mental note to call him when he felt he'd be able to get through the conversation.

Still lost in his thoughts he walked around the corner into the room that the nurse had told him Clark was in. He didn't even look up until he heard the familiar voice, "Dad." Clark called as soon as he saw Ed. Ed strained to give his son a genuine smile. He was happy to hear him talk and relieved to lay eyes on him after helping pull him out of the rubble earlier. There was no mistaking his relief, but he couldn't allow himself to be completely free of worry because of the state of Greg. It was like a veil in front of his eyes, at the front of his mind that he couldn't see past.

"Hey buddy." He walked to his son and took in the way he looked. He had his arm in a cast half way up his forearm and his left leg was in another cast to just above his knee. Other than that, he looked normal to Ed, the only difference was the anxiousness in his eyes as he looked at his father. "Dad, are you okay?" Clark asked, face full of concern sensing that things were not right with his Dad.

"Yeah, buddy, I'm okay." Ed walked over and placed a kiss on Clark's head. He noticed a faint smell of rubble on him, the same smell he was immersed in back at City Hall. "How are you doing? What'd the doctors say?" Clark smiled, "I broke my wrist and my leg and they said I have a cracked rib and some that are bruised. I got to have a CAT scan and then the doctor showed me the results on the screen." Ed looked around seeing no IV's and nothing running directly into his son. "How's the pain?" Ed asked carefully. "It's fine Dad. They gave me some pills and I feel okay. Sometimes it hurts to take, you know, like, a big breath, but the doctors said it would get better. Mom's on the way to get me. How's Dean's dad?" Clark asked, "How's Greg?" Ed sighed, he hadn't expected the question. He looked at his son wondering how he found out until Clark answered the question for him, "Mom told me that she was stopping at the station to get Dean on the way here, she said his Dad was hurt but she didn't know much about it. Then I turned on the TV and it was all over the news. The bomber is dead and Greg was hurt. What happened? You did it, didn't you, Dad?" Clark asked proudly taking in his dad's change in clothes.

Ed nodded but didn't say anything out loud. He was surprised to hear that the information as on the news so fast. "Greg's in surgery just down the hall. The rest of the team is here too." Ed evaded the questions he didn't want to answer. "Is he gonna be okay?" Clark asked eagerly. Ed paused, "I don't know, buddy." Ed answered quietly, wrapping his arm around his son again and pulling him into a sideways hug. He leaned over and kissed him again on top of his head. As Ed let go, Clark quietly confessed, "I'm proud of you, Dad."

Ed pulled away from his son and looked down, closing his eyes. He wanted to tell Clark about his day, the terrible things he'd been a part of and what he had seen. He knew in time he would open up, but now things were too fresh. Ed was pulled from his thoughts by the sound of Clark's cell phone vibrating beside him. Ed was drawn to his son's hand as he picked up his phone. It was dusty with some new dings, more than had previously been on his son's phone. Clark looked up at his dad and told him, "Mom's here, with Dean." Ed nodded. "They're on their way up, I just told Dean where we are."

"Okay, buddy." Ed stood rooted in his spot until Clark prodded him, "Go meet Dean, Dad. He's worried about his dad."

"Okay, Clark. You did really good today, you know that? You did everything right." Ed took Clarks hand and squeezed it quickly. "I love you." Ed finished.

"I love you too, Dad." Clark answered. He met Ed's eyes for a second before he felt he could leave the room. "I'll see you at home." Ed assured him. He slowly headed for the door, going back toward the elevator to meet his wife and Greg's son.

Making his way back he yet again checked his phone waiting for Sam to update him. He tried to convince himself at this point that no news was good news. He figured if they were still working on Greg, at least he was probably okay. It had been nearly an hour since he went into surgery and they hadn't heard anything.

Just as Ed made his way to the lobby in front of the elevator, it beeped and Dean stepped off, wide eyed and scared looking followed closely by Sophie. "Eddie." She said as she went to her husband. "Are you okay?" She hugged him and Ed looked past her to Dean, standing alone and looking worried. "I'm fine, Clark's fine too, or he will be. He's down the hall." Sophie backed up and looked into Ed's eyes.

"Where's my dad?" Dean asked. Ed took a step to Dean and put a heavy hand on his shoulder.

"He's in surgery Dean, just down the hall." Ed hesitated and Dean jumped in. "How bad is it?" Dean asked anxiously. Ed sighed, "Ed?" Dean practically begged, "Just tell me, please." "I don't really know, Dean." Ed answered. "He was conscious for a few minutes when we got him here."

"But." Dean started, expecting further information knowing Ed was holding back. Ed was again reminded how much he was like his father. "But he was shot, Dean. I just don't know. They're still working on him. We won't really know anything until he's out of surgery."

"I want to see him." Dean said. Ed took his hand and rubbed it over his head, "We can't right now, not until they're finished. But we can go wait with the team." Dean nodded.

Sophie took Ed's hand and he looked back to her. "Are you sure you're okay?" She looked into his eyes, concern etched in her features. "I will be, Soph." He sighed. "It's just been a difficult day." Sophie hugged Ed again and kissed him lightly on the cheek. "I love you, Ed. We'll be waiting for you at home." Ed nodded, "I love you too." Ed responded to his wife. "I'll see you guys soon." She walked away toward Clark's room leaving Ed with Dean.


	12. Chapter 12

**_A/N: Thanks for the positive reviews, guys. :) It does help with my little fear of sharing. :)_**

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Ed started walking back towards the waiting room with Dean at his side to where the team was waiting for Greg to emerge. He noticed there was coffee from Timmy's circulating, cups sitting on the cheap tables in the waiting room. Leah handed him a cup when he came into view. "Thanks." Ed said. He looked around and noticed that Sam was missing. He asked Jules, "Where is he?"

Jules answered, "Sam's talking with Holleran. He said wants to talk to all of us about what happened today."

Ed nodded, "Yeah, it's just protocol after something like this." Ed looked around and evaluated his team. Jules still sat with her leg up on the chair, torn pants and bandages obvious. Leah looked tired and upset, sitting quietly forward in her chair, almost waiting for a chance to jump up and do something. Spike worried Ed the most, however. He stood alone in the corner of the room arms crossed with one hand under his chin, not acknowledging Ed, Dean or even his coffee. He looked silently out the window of the waiting area toward the large doors labelled in white capital letters, 'Surgery'. Ed watched him, thinking for a few seconds before Jules started talking to Dean.

"How are you doing, Dean?" She asked. "Pull up a chair." She kindly patted a chair at a 90 degree angle to where she was sitting. "We haven't heard anything new." She told both Dean and Ed.

"How's Clark?" Leah asked.

"He'll be fine. Broken leg and arm, cracked and bruised ribs. He'll be off his feet for a while, but it seems like he'll be okay. Sophie's here to pick him up." Ed kept glancing back to Spike who was silent. Ed was worried about him, he was usually a buoyant force among the team, happy and friendly and bringing the other team members up with him. Now, however, he looked troubled and sad. He was holding something more than the others. Ed looked back to Jules and tried to communicate with his eyes that he wanted to be alone with Spike before saying, "I'm sure Clark would like to see you guys." He swept his eyes over all three of Leah, Jules and Dean and then back to Spike.

Jules caught on, moving to get up. "Let's see if we can catch them before they leave." She stood up in a wobbly fashion and motioned to Dean to come and help her out. Ed knew that she didn't need the help, but Jules was trying to get Dean to go with them. It helped that they were going to be just in the hallway.

Once they were out of the room, Ed approached Spike. He still stood with his back to the rest of the squared room, watching silently out of the glass toward surgery. Ed took a few light steps toward him and put a hand on Spike's shoulder as he spoke to him, "How ya doin', buddy?" Spike flinched slightly at Ed's hand as it broke him from his thoughts. He blinked and seemed to just realize that Ed was there. He looked around the room, surprised that they were there alone.

"Okay." Spike lied poorly to Ed. He returned to looking through the glass, putting his back to Ed again.

"No you're not." Ed told him kindly. Spike blinked again and considered arguing before Ed finished, "None of us are. But that's what's expected after a day like today."

Ed didn't want to force Spike to talk, he knew he would be stubborn about it if he pushed too hard. But he did want to know what was on Spike's mind. He had expected him to be upset, but there was something else bothering him.

"Wanna tell me about it?" Ed asked, hoping that Spike would pick the cues up and start talking. Spike sighed and closed his eyes before he started to shake his head. "Let me help, Spike. Let me in." Ed could see his officer was on the verge of tears, even from behind him. He put his hand on Spike's shoulder and he was rewarded by Spike looking up at him, and then back out into the hallway.

Spike took a breath and blurted out, "Every time they take someone through those doors, I keep thinking it should be me." He looked at his feet and Ed processed what he had just heard. "Spike... what?" He was surprised to hear this from the younger officer, he couldn't make the connection in his mind as to what Spike was thinking. "You did everything right today, Spike. You couldn't have made any different ..."

Spike cut off his leader, "I'm the bomb tech, Ed. Me. I should have been there, it should have been me in those rafters, diffusing the bomb. Now, because of me, the boss is..." Spike stopped talking and Ed realized what Spike was thinking.

"Spike, no. Okay? No." He said firmly. "You were diffusing the other bombs, you stopped all the others, talked us through them."

"Not all the others." Spike corrected. "Donna, I didn't figure it out in time." He said sadly.

"Spike, that's not your fault. Not even your team. I know we all loved Donna like a team member, but she had her own tech, you weren't responsible for that, Spike." Ed's voice quieted with the thought of their fallen SRU member. He tightened his grip on Spike's shoulder, trying to absorb some of his pain.

"I should have been there." He said quietly, saying it out loud made it feel more true. Made him feel more responsible. "It should have been me. Maybe I could have stopped Faber from firing..."

Ed cut him off this time, "Are you saying you're a better shot than Parker?" Ed asked. "That it's his fault?" Ed asked, a hint of anger in his voice as the intensity rose.

This brought Spike fully into the conversation, he realized he wasn't really thinking, just talking. "Of course not, Ed." It was Spike's turn to be offended, he would never intimate that his skills were better than anyone, let alone Parker. His voice dropped off and he looked down continuing, "But I should have been there. It should have been me." He finished in almost a whisper.

"Spike, where is this coming from?" Ed tried to reason with him. "You can't be everywhere, you just can't. You have to trust other people and let them help you."

"Help me?" Spike asked rhetorically, craning his neck to look around at Ed. "Look what happens when people help me, Ed." Spike spun completely toward Ed squaring himself to his teammate, frustration evident in his tone. "Remember when Lew tried to help me?" He raised his voice, "Do you remember that? What happened to him?" Spike was picking up steam now, rolling into a near yell.

"Come on, Spike, it wasn't your..." Ed tried to reason, but Spike cut him off.

"Wasn't my fault, sure, wasn't my fault," Spike mocked, "But the bomb was my responsibility. And now, today. Ed, Donna's dead, Sam could have been killed and Boss, Boss got shot 3 times. 3 TIMES. By a bomber!" Spike was in a full tirade, his eyes wide in anger, "He still might die, and then what? What if the Boss dies?" The words hit Ed like punch and he stepped back, but Spike kept going, "Whose fault is that? And what do I do? Lew, my Dad, Mack, Donna, Boss, I can't." Spike finally paused, taking a breath and letting his tone drop, "I can't go on like this, I don't know what do to, I can't take any more, I just don't..." He lost his ability to talk, his voice disappeared and when Ed looked again, he saw Spike with tears in his eyes. Ed closed the gap between them and grabbed him behind the neck, pulling him into a hug. Spike leaned forward onto Ed's shoulder and let his emotions roll forward, tears falling onto the blue scrub shirt Ed was wearing. "What happens if he dies, Ed?" Spike asked again, voice muffed as he spoke into Ed's chest. Ed shook his head before talking over Spike's shoulder, still holding onto him, "Then we honour him by leading Team One on, we carry him with us and go forward." Spike's grief and talking about his fear of losing Greg had tears returning to Ed's eyes as well. He let Spike go, allowing him to see his leader also emotional at the thought of losing their friend. Ed understood what Spike was going through. He had had a tough road lately, losing people close to him. Unlike Ed, who had a relationship with Parker that grew together and learned together like brothers, Parker was a father figure to Spike. He had been there for him when his father died, when Lew died and now that this has happened to Parker, Spike had no one to lean on. He was scared, and had no one left.

"It'll be okay, Spike." Ed put a hand back on Spike's shoulder. "We just need to be here for him right now, like he's always been here for us."


	13. Chapter 13

_** A/N: Sorry about the bad split. I should have done it differently. Too late now I guess.**_

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_"It'll be okay, Spike." Ed put a hand back on Spike's shoulder. "We just need to be here for him right now, like he's always been here for us."_

Spike paused and looked Ed in the eyes. "I think that's it, Ed." Ed raised his eyebrows in question, "He's always been there for me, helped out and made things better, you know? But I wasn't there for him." Ed shook his head, "You did everything you could. He knows that, and you have to know that too." Spike studied his feet for a second before looking back to Ed, who reached out and patted his shoulder, giving him a solemn nod. "You know that." Ed repeated. Spike sighed and wanted to believe Ed, but he wasn't sure he was quite there yet. "Thanks, Ed." Spike said. Still worried but with a head a little clearer he asked, "How are you doing? How's Clark?" Ed smiled, Spike had been in the room when he answered that question once before, but he updated him on his son's condition and told him he was doing alright, "It's been a tough day." Ed admitted. Spike nodded and noticed the coffee sitting nearby. "That for me?" He asked. "Yep. From Leah." Spike reached down and grabbed it. Ed continued, "Holleran wants to debrief the whole team with SIU but if you're not up for it, I can call him off." Ed offered. There were clauses built into the investigations that allowed officers who had been through something extremely traumatic to put off their interviews if the psychological damage would be increased.

Spike, however, shook his head. "No, I can do it." Ed raised his eyebrows, "You sure, Spike?" "Yep." Spike bobbed his head up and down looking eager again.

Past Spike's shoulder, Ed saw a doctor come out of the doors marked 'Surgery'. He had the surgical cap and scrubs on, right down to the shoe covers that Ed knew the surgeons wore. He stood close to Spike's height but was older, in his late 40's, short brown hair showing under his surgical cap. He was built like a runner and walked with purpose as he held a metal clipboard containing a file. Ed's eyes were fixated on him and Spike turned and saw him as well. Goosebumps appeared on Ed's skin as he saw the surgeon turn toward the waiting room. He walked through the doorway and took in the sight of Ed and Spike gaping at him. Both men looking terrified waiting for him to make the first move.

"You're here for Sergeant Parker?" The surgeon asked. It was almost a redundant question with Spike still in his SRU uniform. When they didn't say no right away, he asked checking his clipboard quickly, "One of you Edward T. Lane?" Ed was surprised that the surgeon was asking for him, he couldn't imagine why but he stepped forward, "I'm Ed Lane, this is Spike Scarlatti, also a member of Parker's team." Ed swallowed as he felt nauseas again. He wanted to pounce on the doctor and steal the chart. He wanted to know right now what was going on with Greg.

"I'm Dr. Linden, Head of Surgery here. Mr. Parker has listed you, Mr. Lane, as his next of kin and medical proxy on his file. There was a backlog getting them here because of the volume of patients and we are just now getting to notifying and checking permissions." Ed didn't care about this, "How is he, doc?" Ed asked bluntly, his frustration showing through slightly in his tone. The doctor hesitated looking at Spike, his eyes darting down to his name tag and then back down at the forms, "Mr. Scarlatti, you are also listed here as a medical contact for him." Spike was surprised and more than a little bit humbled by this. Parker had never mentioned that to him but he would worry about that later. Only nodding to the doctor he braced himself mentally for news.

Dr. Linden took a breath and started to talk, "Mr. Parker suffered a gunshot wound to his leg and another to his chest. His vest protected him from the third one but it also did some damage." The doctor sighed, "We got him into surgery quickly and easily removed the bullet from his knee. The bullet in his chest caused a great deal of damage and created a variety of problems during surgery. At more than one point we nearly lost him, but each time we managed to bring him back. The bullet entered through the rib cage shattering 2 ribs and puncturing his lung on contact. Additionally, the bullet continued through the other side of Mr. Parker's lung and severed major vessels leading to his stomach and other organs as well as nicking his stomach. We retrieved it near his spleen. We were lucky it didn't enter his bloodstream and move through his body, however, bone shrapnel from his ribs as well as metal from the bullet itself could cause problems still. Additionally, two of his left side ribs are cracked from the impact of the first bullet. He lost a great deal of blood and we are trying to increase his blood volume right now. We will explore the extent of his knee injury in the coming hours. The priority was to stabilize him and remove the bullets for now."

Ed sighed, "So he's okay?" He asked, finally allowing some hope to creep into his voice.

The doctor shook his head, "He's in extremely critical condition. Right now he is in intensive care and he needs to be constantly monitored. He is still on assisted breathing and we will keep him on the ventilator for at least 24 hours. We are keeping him sedated because of the pain and also to give his body a chance to fight. The next few hours are critical but if he gets through the next 24, he has a good chance. Mr. Lane, I need your permission to keep him on the ventilator, which is essentially keeping him alive. He will likely need at least one additional surgery once his blood volume is back up to repair any leakage and possibly put an additional plate into his chest cavity for his ribs."

Ed closed his eyes and took a deep breath before pulling his chin up and nodding to the doctor. "I'll sign whatever you need." The doctor turned the chart around and Ed quickly took the pen off the top of the clipboard and scribbled his name.

"Thank you. We're going to do everything we can. We heard who he was from the ER and we're proud to be able to help such a hero." Ed nodded, unsure what to say other than, "Can I see him?"

"He's sedated, but you can see him. We managed to find him a private room at least for now. Like I said we are keeping a close eye on him and, to be honest, we aren't expecting for him to make it through the night without some kind of event. However, you can see him. Follow me."


	14. Chapter 14

Ed and Spike left the waiting area, Spike immediately sending a group text to Sam, Jules, Leah and Dean that read, "Out of surgery. Not awake. Will send room #."

They followed the doctor down the hallways until he came to a stop outside a room at the end of a long hallway that ended at a window with 2 chairs underneath it. Linden turned to leave, "I'll be by to check on him soon and the nurses are monitoring him from the desk as well as rounding frequently. If you need anything, press the button beside the bed and help will be here right away." Ed reached out to shake the doctors hand, "Thanks, Doc." He said. Dr. Linden turned and left them alone. Ed faced the closed door and looked quickly over to Spike. He didn't say anything before pushing it open leaving Spike outside, as the team leader he had an unspoken right to go first.

Inside the small darkened room, Ed stopped dead at the sight in front of him. The figure on the bed looked nothing like Greg Parker. His leg was elevated, supported at the knee and calf and heavily bandaged while the other sat under the covers. A blanket covered his torso and rose to his chest, which was moving up and down to the rhythm of a machine nearby. Ed could see a small amount of white gauze wrapped around his chest as the V neck of his green hospital gown dipped down. This was also where a number of wires disappeared from a variety of machines, attached somewhere to Greg. His arms were by his sides, one with a monitor on his finger and his other arm contained an IV drip that branched out to an IV pole that hung numerous bags. Ed recognized one as blood even from the door but the others were clear or slightly coloured and he didn't know what Greg was being given.

Greg's face was obscured by the breathing apparatus that kept him exchanging oxygen regularly. His face looked pale and his eyes were closed and still. Ed took a few tentative steps across the room, stopping right at Greg's bedside. He looked down at his friend and sighed. "Hey Greg, hey buddy." Ed whispered, taking in his friend's state. Ed was soon distracted by the numerous LCD screens that displayed a variety numbers and beeped at regular intervals. He didn't think he'd ever seen that many little screens, even when Sophie was having Izzy. He wished he knew what they all meant, the only one he recognized was the heart rate monitor. Ed looked behind him and there was a chair nearby. He pulled it to the bed and sat down, putting his hand on Greg's non-IV'd arm, leaning over the plastic sides of the bed. It was weird to see Greg in short sleeves, even when not on shift Greg tended toward dress shirts. Ed left his hand on his friend's arm and brought his other arm up onto the plastic bedside, leaning on it with his chin. He stared blankly at Greg, feeling sadness wash over him again. He couldn't believe that such a short time ago Greg had done so much. Not only had he diffused the last bomb and solved the mystery of the location, but he was with the team through their tough work as well. He was a great man, and he now was fighting for his life because of one disturbed man. The potential lives that could be lost if Greg didn't survive and if he couldn't do his job were astronomical. Greg saved lives almost every day. What if he had to change? What if he didn't make it? Ed had so many questions and so many worries. He didn't know what to do. He did know one thing, though.

"I'm here for ya, buddy." Ed sniffed while he patted Parker's arm slightly. "We're all here. You gotta keep fighting, okay? You have to keep fighting." Ed watched Parker's chest rise and fall, wishing his eyes would open, the warm brown, assessing eyes that had always been watching over him.

Slowly, Ed got up and headed back for the door. He wanted to stay with Greg, but he knew the others would be waiting to come and see him. For courtesy, he would make sure each member of the team got time alone with their sergeant the first time they saw him like this. After, more of them would hopefully be allowed in to keep their boss company. Initially, though, each team member would react to the shock differently.

Ed paused and looked back at the bed, whispering, "I'll be back, buddy." He put his hand on the cold door handle and pulled it open, leaving the room.


	15. Chapter 15

_**A/N: Okay, the sharing has been kind of fun so far. Just an FYI, this chapter (and a couple of others) contains a flashback. Sometimes during the show I wanted MORE, so I tried to incorporate it into this a little. Enjoy. :)**_

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Outside, it seemed so much lighter after being in the room with Parker even though it was pitch dark outside the nearby window. His eyes adjusted and he saw figures outside the room. Dean stood looking anxious next to Jules who had her arm around Greg's son. Sam had returned and Ed realized the Leah was missing, she must have been with Holleran. Spike was ready to get inside and see Greg, but they knew Dean would be next to see his father. Ed noticed that Jules was holding a pair of shoes in her hand. After a second he recognized them as his own. She followed his gaze and held them out, "Sophie had these in the car. She noticed you weren't wearing anything except socks."

"Thanks, Jules." Ed reached out and took them, dropping them on the ground and stuffing his feet in hastily. "Dean, you wanna see your Dad?" Dean stood rooted in his spot for a second before Ed reached out toward him, "Come on, it's okay." Dean stepped forward and Ed took him under his arm. Turning, Dean asked, "Come with me?" Ed looked down to Dean and nodded, "Absolutely." Of course he would stay with Dean. Ed pushed the door open and the two of them entered the room again.

At the sight of his dad, Dean paused and took a sharp breath. As much as he had known he wouldn't be in good condition, he was still shocked by the image in front of him. He stepped out of Ed's arm and made the few steps quickly across to Greg's bedside. Ed stood back allowing Dean to set the pace for absorbing the state of his father. "Dad." He mumbled quietly. Dean raised his hand as if he was going to touch him, but didn't seem to know what to do. He finally settled on reaching down into his dad's hand, trying to not disturb the finger clip he was wearing to monitor his vitals. "Ed, what did the doctor say? Spike didn't get a chance to explain..." Ed stepped up and started explaining, "They said the surgery was successful, they got the bullets out." Ed leaned his hands on the bed looking at Greg while he spoke to Dean, "He's stable right now, but they're probably going to have to do at least another surgery. They're a little worried about pieces of the bullet in his bloodstream. He's on the ventilator until they are sure they got everything. They're keeping him under so he can heal." Dean sighed and brought his free hand up to wipe a tear from his cheek. "He's strong, Dean, stronger mentally than anyone I've ever known. He'll find his way through this." Ed put a hand on Dean's shoulder. Dean didn't respond, "You have to believe he'll be okay." Ed gave Dean's shoulder a squeeze and finally he met Ed's eyes. Dean nodded and Ed asked, "Do you want to stay? Do you want me to stay?" Dean wiped another stubborn tear from his eye, "No. I know the team wants to see him too." Ed smiled, "Well, you're his family, Dean, you can stick around and take all the time you need." Dean looked into Ed's troubled eyes, "But, you're his family too. The team." Dean took a breath and continued, "He loves you guys, I know how it works. Seeing that was part of the reason…" Dean paused finding his voice again, "It was part of the reason I wanted to see him again. That first day when I came to see him at the station I could just tell, you know? He was different then when I was a kid." Ed was intrigued and waited for Dean to elaborate, "He's so much more open now. I could tell that the way you guys work is based on that, you know? His openness leads you guys to talk too, instead of holding it all in like he used to when he was... when I was younger." Ed smiled at Dean's choice of words.

It struck him again how similar Dean was to Greg, and also how simply an outsider could sum up something that was so complicated for Greg and the team. Ed knew he was remembering painful history with Greg and his ex-wife. Things were not good at home when Greg was drinking and letting the job get to him. Ed had vivid memories of his friend drinking, calling him at all hours for various reasons. Sometimes to talk, sometimes to yell and occasionally for help. Ed was so proud of Greg for straightening his life out and in the past years he had learned exactly what had caused the downfall as well as what had happened to turn it around. Ed remembered driving Greg home after a call where he was held by acquaintances of a woman named Haley and learning the details.

_Ed rounded the corner to the briefing room seeing Greg sitting alone on the table looking out over the Toronto skyline. The bandage on his head drew Ed's attention. He wondered what happened to cause such a gash. Ed had been standing next to Greg when the medics had spoken to him about a possible concussion. Greg hadn't wanted to go to the hospital assuring them that he felt good enough to go home. Greg heard Ed enter the room and turned slightly. "You okay, buddy?" Ed asked. Greg looked down and shook his head slowly, sliding off the table and walking toward his friend. He took the lead as Ed turned off the lights in the briefing room and they headed out toward the cars, Ed putting his hand on Greg's back as they walked. "Wanna tell me about it?" Ed asked. Not pressing him, but letting him know he would listen if Greg wanted to talk. _

_"Not quite yet, Eddie." Greg answered in a quiet voice. The pair walked down the stairs together to where Ed had left his SUV. Ed didn't say anything allowing Greg to process and set his own pace. He could feel the explanation coming, he knew Greg would open up. As they started to drive, Ed was rewarded by Greg starting to explain. "I thought she needed my help. I owe her my life. When I got there, though, she wasn't there. It was just Kevin and Tyler. I didn't know what it was about and how they had connected me to Haley, but I tried to get away, I had to make sure she was safe." Ed nodded, "Is that how you got wacked on the head?" Greg nodded but then stopped when his vision swam with the motion. "We went for a tumble over one of the railings." "How high up, Greg?" Ed asked with concern. "Only about half a story." Ed shook his head, "Half a story onto a concrete floor backwards? No wonder they were worried about a concussion. How are you feeling now?" Ed asked, Greg could hear the concern in his voice. "I'm fine, Eddie." "I'm staying at your place tonight, just to be safe." Greg started to protest, "Eddie, you don't have to..." Ed cut him off, "We almost lost you once today, Greg, it's non-negotiable. I'm not taking that chance." _

_Greg sighed and put the heels of his hands over his eyes. He was tired and wanted to sleep, he didn't have the energy to argue with Ed. He knew also that this was Ed's way of getting his own peace of mind after the scare of finding Greg in trouble. They drove in silence for a few minutes before Greg continued, "When Haley arrived, she came to help me and was upset. She told me who Kevin was and I knew we had to get out of there. We tried to find a way out but they found us. That's when they locked me in with the explosives. Kevin wanted me to tell Haley that I had killed her mother." Ed snapped at Greg, "But you didn't kill her mother, Greg." Parker answered, "I know that Eddie. But I wasn't going to let Haley find out she did it. After everything she's been through, I'd rather have her think I did it then her, especially the way things were going." Ed was trying to look at Greg while driving, "You're telling me you had the chance to explain yourself, to tell the truth, and you didn't? You were going to let them-" Greg cut Ed off, "Haley doesn't deserve to have to deal with that. And it wouldn't have changed anything." Ed didn't want to hear any of it. "You don't deserve to die to protect that secret. I don't care what happened." Greg paused, sighing in frustration and stopping Ed's angry reasoning, "She saved my life, Eddie." Ed couldn't believe the way Greg was being so casual with this own life, how stubbornly he was holding the belief that he deserved to die to save this girl, "She saved your life? How? By showing up? We were on the way." Greg sighed, there was no way he was going to not be able to explain, he'd been holding this so long, "No, Ed, not today. Did you get the date on the file?" Ed nodded, "Yeah, so?" _

_"It was the day they left, Ed. That was the file that did it. After seeing that, I just couldn't take it. I went home to my family already drunk. I took it out on my wife, and Dean. But when I woke up after that binge, they were gone, and she was right to go." Greg was looking out the window away from Ed, not letting him see his expression, the grief in his eyes. Ed sat in silence, waiting. He knew that something terrible had triggered Greg's wife leaving and he knew that there was a binge after. Ed had received the phone call from Greg days later asking for help, but he hadn't learned what had been the turning point and why. "I couldn't face it, Eddie, I went out and bought a case of vodka." Ed whispered, "Greg." He wasn't sure he wanted to hear the rest of this story but Parker ploughed on, "I was still drunk from the last binge, I went home with the case and vowed to finish all those bottles. You saw the place, what I did and how torn up it was when I was done. A couple days in I managed to stagger to the mail slot and there it was on the floor, a letter from Haley. She thanked me, Eddie. And she was scared but she was going to move forward. She was stronger than I was." Greg brought a hand up and wiped his eyes. "If she hadn't sent that letter, if it hadn't come when it did... I could already feel it, Eddie. My body was shutting down, but I was going strong, and I still had 4 bottles left. I told myself that morning that they were all going to be finished by nightfall. I didn't want to fight anymore, until she showed me what bravery was. I couldn't let her live with killing her mother when she had saved my life." _

Ed was brought back to the room by the sound of Dean sniffling. Remembering Greg's admission and explanation highlighted how far he'd come. The Greg from when Dean was a child would never have talked through anything that deeply emotional. He had gown, and because of that, so had Ed. "I know he's a different person now, Dean. He's always felt the same way about you though. He's just gotten better at showing it, at making the right choices." Ed put his hand again on the door handle and Dean was right behind him. They opened the door and left the room.


	16. Chapter 16

When the door opened, the team all looked to it, anxiously waiting while Ed struggled for words. The one of the two chairs under the window was occupied by Jules while Spike and Sam paced aimlessly. Spike said nothing but looked right at Ed before he nodded and passed by him heading directly into Greg's room. He couldn't wait any longer.

Spike crossed quiclky to Greg's unconscious form as the door closed behind him. He was so familiar with hospitals now, especially after his dad moving in and out over the last months of his life. Now, however, was different. His Dad hadn't spent a lot of time unconscious, he was with him right to the end. Spike stared wide-eyed at the monitors taking in the numbers. He knew some of what they meant. He lowered himself into the chair, slowly reaching down and touching his hand, "Boss…" Spike stared at Greg, watching the ventilator do its work and listening to the beeping of the machines. Spike had never felt the same way about anyone the way he felt about Parker. He reflected on his past with him and how he had come to respect and love this man. Spike knew of his own defence mechanisms, he was the joker but used that to keep people at arm's length. Parker, though, had seen through that immediately when he started with SRU, probably, Spike realized, even before he brought him on to the team. He hadn't even needed to address it directly with Spike, but Parker had managed to bring the wall down, brick by brick, and get into Spike's heart.

Spike could feel his heart breaking at the sight of Parker like this. Even when the people around him were in chaos, Parker almost always kept himself together and knew just what was needed. Spike was brought back to the last time they lost a team member, his best friend.

_Spike was in a rush to get back to the trucks, needing to be in action to solve this problem. He could do it, he knew. Frustrated, he saw the team standing there, not moving, not getting supplies. Was he going to have to do it all himself? "Why are you all just standing there? Let's go. I said we need a shield, okay? We need water. We're gonna do a weight transfer." He pushed forward but he couldn't help catching the look in his sergeant's eyes. Sadness and pity resided there. Then he heard the voice of his friend "Spike." Spike answered Lew before he heard him reassure, "It's gonna be okay." He sounded sad as well, sounded like he was giving up. But he couldn't be. Spike had the answers, he was going to solve the puzzle. "Lew?" He called to him right before he heard his headset feedback with a deafening screech. He heard the headset, he heard the explosion, and he heard someone screaming. He realized it was him, he couldn't help it. He was on the ground, his legs having given out underneath him. Everything stopped. He wanted to stop, but his heart defiantly beat on. Emotion rolled through him, racking his body while he rocked back and forth on the ground. His chest was tight and he couldn't breathe. He caught a glimpse of someone coming towards him. It was Parker. His eyes were glistening with tears as he came to his officer. Saying nothing, he slowly knelt next to Spike. Spike could feel his presence there and then felt his hands on him, one arm wrapping around his shoulder and pulling him close. He leaned into his boss and cried, reaching up to hold on, grabbing at him for some sense of grounding. Parker reciprocated by holding Spike even closer, putting both arms around him and pulling him into his arms so tight that Spike almost felt crushed. But he didn't want it to stop, Spike only pushed himself closer to his mentor. The idea that he could still feel something reassured him. He gripped his sergeant's arm and bowed his head deep into his chest, sobs heaving over him. "Spike. I'm sorry." Parker's voice broke as he leaned down over top of his officer, "I'm so sorry." Spike felt pressure on his head as Parker rested his cheek on him, enclosing him with his body and protecting him from the chaos that surrounded him. People were running by them, EMT's, fire fighters, other officers moving in a rush, yelling and working the scene. Parker had held Spike on the ground until he was ready to take the first steps, until he felt the walls stop crashing down. Until he could face the world outside._

Spike had no concept of how long Parker had stayed with him and held him. It could have been minutes, it could have been hours, but he remembered the feeling of being safe there, enclosed in Parker's arms while the world around him was in chaos. It was one of the defining moments in their complicated relationship.

Spike reflected how he could never really pinpoint the emotion that he had for Parker. It was fuelled by so many feelings that he didn't really have one to sum it up. He certainly knew that he felt protective of Parker. He remembered briefings here and there, intense ones, where there was intimation that maybe Parker's decision was wrong. Spike was always the first one to defend him. He also felt extra alert whenever Parker was in the field, just that extra edge when he worried something might happen to him. He also knew that he felt respect and admiration. The more knowledge he gained of him, the more intense these feelings became. Critiques from the Sarge were always to be taken seriously, but he always managed to deliver them and make his team feel confident still. For someone who did so much verbal negotiating, Parker tended to communicate with the team in looks and touches. He would pat them on the back, put an arm around them or give them a look of pride rather than say how he felt. When he did communicate his feelings with words, though, they were always so well chosen. Spike remembered Parker telling him that he was one of the best cops he had ever known after the death of his training officer, Mac. Spike nearly teared up thinking how much pride that brought him. He wanted to frame those words and hang them on the wall.

Also, closely tied with that, a feeling he harboured was love for Greg. Spike smiled thinking that he still called him 'Boss' and rarely anything else. To an outsider, that might have seemed like there was some ego involved in Parker's role, but Spike knew it became one of those terms that was all encompassing for him. Ed was the only one that ever used his first name with the Boss, but that was the nature of their relationship. He remembered the last family picnic they had had where Sarge had made the decision to stay with the team. He had spoken to Spike in Italian, which was rare for him even though Spike knew he was fluent. He had told him that he loved him like a son. He had turned away because, out of everything, Spike hadn't been expecting that from Parker. He was so warmed by the thought and surprised to hear him say it. Saying it in Italian had given them privacy even inside the group of the team. He had thought of Parker as a father figure in his life since not long after he joined SRU. It was almost an unspoken bond, but hearing Sarge say it made it even more powerful. He had been rendered speechless and still wanted to follow up on that conversation since at the time all Spike could muster was calling him lovingly by the name he always used, "Boss."


	17. Chapter 17

_**A/N: Sorry about the bad split again. I really have to keep reading ahead before I split these things. Thanks for those that have reviewed, you're all too kind. :)**_

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_He had thought of Parker as a father figure in his life since not long after he joined SRU. It was almost an unspoken bond, but hearing Sarge say it made it even more powerful. He had been rendered speechless and still wanted to follow up on that conversation since at the time all Spike could muster was calling him lovingly by the name he always used, "Boss." _

Spike now held Parker's hand and looked into his pale features, thinking of the Italian words he had spoken to him earlier in this day. Slurring out that he was proud of him. All Spike wanted right now was for Boss to hold him again, like he did with Lew, and tell him that it was all going to be okay. Now, however, the tables were turned. It was Parker that would need the reassurances. "It's gonna be okay, Boss. We're here for you." Spike squeezed Greg's hand, "We're right outside, okay?" Spike didn't want to leave, but he knew the rest of the team would want to get in and see their team mate. Gently, Spike put Parker's hand down at his side, stepped back scrubbing his face with his hands and then turned toward the door. They were some of the hardest steps he'd taken, walking away from Parker and leaving him there. He paused at the door, took a breath and opened it, leaving so the next team member could see him.

Opening the door, Spike met eyes with Sam. He paused for a second before turning to Jules, his new wife. He loved her more than anything, but he wanted to spend just a few minutes alone with Parker. He had a feeling that his emotions would get the better of him. The rest of the team hadn't seen what he had at the stadium. Images of Parker bleeding and helpless were burned into his mind intensified by the reaction of their team leader, Ed. Sam had been with Ed through a lot of things over the years but his reaction to Parker and that he immediately went to pieces told Sam how severe Parker's wounds were before he had even had a chance to look at him. When Sam finally did see what had happened, how bad it was, it took everything he had to complete his mission and secure the subject. Then, part of him was grateful that he went to find help. He had seen a lot of things in his time as a military man and a cop, but seeing Parker like that was at the top of his list of moments he didn't want to have in his mind. He remembered running to get help, but also part of him was running to get away. He didn't want to stay there. He couldn't stand what was in front of him.

Sam turned away from Jules and entered the room. Not hesitating he crossed directly over to his Sergeant. Standing over him he took in the man in front of him. Sam couldn't help but notice how much older he seemed while he slept. The Parker he knew was youthful even though he had a few years on Sam. He also seemed to be in constant motion. This version of the same man seemed aged and, Sam hated to admit, beaten. He looked over the prone and broken body of his co-worker and anger passed over him. It was so unfair that a man that had dedicated his life to being a great cop and helping others now faced this.

Sam dropped into the chair next to Parker and tears formed in the corners of his eyes. "I shouldn't have listened to you." His head fell forward and he squeezed his eyes closed, feeling the tears continue to come. "I should have done the right thing, come in and covered you." Sam had regretted following the orders to stay out of the building since he had first laid eyes on Parker in the stadium. If he had gone to provide cover, this wouldn't have happened. "I'm so sorry."

Sam looked again at Parker. He felt like the words just didn't cover the injustice that lay in front of him. He stared into the features of the man he had come to love over the last years, who had always been fair, diplomatic and given him a fair shot even when Sam knew that he was dropped into his precious team out of nowhere. He could have been cruel to Sam, causing him to leave the team. But that wasn't Parker. He gave Sam a fair shot and welcomed him to the team. Then he had risked his own career to allow Sam to be with Jules.

Reflecting on their relationship he remembered vividly when Parker had found out about he and Jules after the team was already on probation. The feeling he had when he'd come down the stairs at her place and saw him standing there, the look in his eyes had said it all. He had disappointed the man who had rolled the dice on his own career to defend them. Their choices had put him in an impossible situation. Since that morning, Sam had thought long and hard about what that had meant for Parker and also what Parker meant to him. He had always managed to get a 'talking to' from his father, but he had brushed it off knowing that his dad's disappointment in his choices didn't really matter to him. Sarge, however, had a different effect on him. The idea of disappointing Parker made Sam inwardly cringe. That morning in Jules' entryway had really stayed with him, the uncharacteristic, but much warranted anger he had shown that barely disguised the disappointment in his voice, followed by the self-incrimination when he admitted that he knew all along. Sam realized then how ludicrous it was to think they could hide their relationship from him. Sarge never missed anything. But the idea that he didn't confront them even when he did know had made it worse for Sam. Parker hadn't believed they would go behind his back. The fact that Sam made that choice stung him still. Even though it worked out in the end Sam was haunted by what could have been.

"I'm sorry, Boss." Sam wiped his eyes and stood, not wanting to take his eyes off Parker, but knowing he had to go. Jules would be anxiously waiting. He took two backwards steps toward the door and found himself at the wall. Opening the door, he found Jules right there waiting on the other side. She stepped forward and took his hand, leading him back into the darkened room.


	18. Chapter 18

_**A/N: Thanks for the reviews, especially the constants, KevinxoShelley (love your U/N), Sewtunes and garb50. kenorob1, thanks for admitting that the story affected you on an emotional level. I really felt like I just got my 'cry' on when when they cut the show, so that was kind of the impetus behind this. **_

_**You guys really are helping me get the proofing done and the story turned out. It picks up soon with some action.**_

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Sam leaned his arm around his new wife's shoulders, partially to comfort her and also to be there in case her leg gave out. She was still limping badly from the injury she sustained earlier in the day, or was it now yesterday? Sam realized he had no concept of time. He knew it was dark outside, but that was as far as he had noticed. He thought about how something as mundane as time could seem so important but right now was so irrelevant. He didn't care if he'd been here for two minutes or two weeks, he wanted to be here for his team.

"Sarge." Jules whispered, crossing the few steps to his bed from the door. She reached down and took his hand, Sam still holding onto her, now rubbing her shoulder in an attempt to comfort her. She lowered herself into the chair that Sam had occupied only minutes ago while she absently rubbed the back of his hand with her thumb. "Boss, you have to come back to us, okay?" She quietly plead to her mentor and Sergeant. "We need you." Sam had moved behind Jules and had a hand on each of her shoulders as they shook silently. Jules watched the monitors and machines attempting to control her emotions. Reaching up she wiped her face with her hands, finding her voice after a few minutes. "I can't believe this has happened, Sam." She craned her neck to look back at her husband. "I know." Sam agreed, voice gravelly. "It's the boss," Jules continued, "He's not supposed to get hurt." Sam felt the same way, "It's the job." He whispered. Jules stood and turned to Sam, "Things just... happen." Sam's voice cracked. He had no answers, just like the rest of the team. Jules stepped in and hugged her husband while keeping an eye on Parker. They stood holding each other for a few minutes before Sam pulled away, "We should see about the others." Jules nodded and they turned, hand in hand, toward the door to Sarge's room.

Opening it, they noticed Leah wasn't back yet from her debriefing. They didn't want the Boss to be alone, though and without thinking of rules or hospital procedure, Sam held the door to Greg's room open allowing the team as well as Dean to enter the cramped space. The room was already quite a bit smaller than average and once most of the team was inside, it seemed even more confined.

"Jules, you need to have that leg really looked at." Ed motioned towards Jules' cut and bandaged leg as they stood in the doorway.

"I know Ed, I'm gonna go and do it, I just wanted to see Sarge first." She sighed.

"And she's going to go right now and have it cleaned up properly." Sam had stepped back toward the door and put a hand behind Jules guiding her away from the room. "Let's head downstairs to Emergency. It might not be as busy now." Jules allowed herself to be led away by Sam but she paused turning before getting too far.

"I want to know anything that happens." Jules warned Ed. Ed nodded.

"Of course," Ed put a hand on her shoulder, "Anything. Now go." The pair started to walk, Ed watching from his spot in the door of Parker's room. Once they turned the corner toward the elevator, Ed turned back around to face the room containing Greg. "Anybody want anything?" Ed asked Dean who sat next to his Dad's bed and Spike who sat on the opposite side of Greg in the other chair in the room. Spike shook his head and Dean answered absently, "No thanks." Ed surveyed the tiny room and saw nowhere else to sit. He pulled a chair in from the hall and hauled it in next to Dean. Ed exhaled heavily as he sat down. "How about some tube, guys?" Ed tried to sound light as he grabbed the remote and turned on the tiny TV in the room. Even though it was the middle of the night, the news was in full swing. Every channel he checked he seemed to find information about the day that they had just witnessed.

The three of them sat together, watching Greg's machines keep him alive but lost in their own thoughts. Ed was all consumed by the day, his mind racing over the things he had seen. He noticed that the sun was coming up outside the window behind Spike. As he noticed the lightening sky it struck Ed just how much had changed in the last 24 hours, since the sun last rose. Lives would be changed forever in one single day. With a quick knock the door behind Dean opened. Leah had returned from her briefing. Ed stood, ready to vacate the room for Leah to have a minute alone with Greg.

"It's okay, Ed, sit down." Leah crossed behind Ed and Dean's chairs and the foot of the bed. She arrived next to Spike and then reached down gently touching Greg's exposed arm. She closed her eyes and stood for a second, hand on Greg before backing off behind Spike again.

Spike looked up at Leah, "My turn?" He asked referring to Holleran and SIU.

Leah patted him on the shoulder and smiled at him, "Yeah, I don't think there's much left to ask really." Spike bobbed his head in a nod and stood, making his way carefully around the bed. As he squeezed by Ed, he grabbed his arm, "You're sure?" He asked Spike, protectively wanting to make sure he was ready for this. Spike looked at Ed and half smiled, "Yep." Ed released his arm and let Spike slip out the door. Leah took up the space that Spike had held and Ed watched her get comfortable and then eyed Dean who didn't seem to have any attention for anyone other than his father.

Ed reached out and patted him on the back, Dean acknowledged him with a nod but didn't change his focus. Ed ran his hand over his head and sat back, his mind still buzzing with worry for Greg and also Spike and the rest of his team.

Spike wandered down the hallway toward the staff lounge that was being used as an interrogation room. He paused at the door focusing his energy before pushing it open and greeting Holleran and Mike, the SIU investigator. To his surprise, Holleran stood and greeted him by shaking his hand, "Spike, excellent work today." Spike was shocked at this treatment from his Commander and also feeling somewhat undeserving of the praise. It was unlike Holleran, he knew he wasn't heartless but he could be extremely professional to the point of almost seeming robotic. Holleran knew what he had to do to get the job done and get it done right.

Spike sat down at the table and Mike introduced himself. Holleran asked Spike to take them through the day. Starting with the first bomb at the 911 Call Centre. Spike handled it all well, like Ed he was able to compartmentalize his feelings and his work at times. The feelings of grief threatened to bubble to the surface but he kept them at bay while also sitting with his hand on his phone waiting for an update on Parker. He knew he just had to get through this, as much as the day was fresh and as much as his feelings were close to the surface.

They were finished questioning Spike within an hour. Relieved that it was over he quickly jumped up and headed back to Parker's room. He jogged as quickly as he could back, relieved when he finally made it back and pushed the door open. Inside still sat Ed, Dean and Leah. Sam and Jules hadn't returned yet.

He felt like he hadn't breathed properly since he left the room and Spike exhaled heavily when he finally laid eyes on Greg again. Ed looked at Spike and asked, "How'd it go?" Spike nodded, still staring at Parker, "Good. Any change?" He asked, tension in his voice. "No." Dean answered unhappily.

Ed looked around and realized they were short chairs. He stepped back outside, grabbing the last remaining chair from the hallway. He handed it to Spike who placed it around the other side of the bed. Ed returned to his own chair and glanced at Dean who continued to sit still, staring at his unconscious father. He settled in again to his chair, none of those saying anything, lulled by the sounds of the beeping machines slowly into sleep.


	19. Chapter 19

Ed came to what felt like only seconds later. The sun blazing in through the blinds and assaulting his squinted eyes, however, told him that he had been asleep much longer. Becoming more aware of the things around him, he heard the TV. It was still on but it was showing some kind of sappy daytime soap opera. Forcing his eyes open completely, Ed looked around seeing Spike leaning down low in his chair, eyes closed and asleep and Leah in the corner with her head leaning against the wall of the room also sleeping. Dean was still directed at his father, but his eyes were also closed, arms crossed across his chest. Ed stretched and went looking for his phone. He found it on the ground nearby. Thumbing through the messages he found he had 2 messages from Sam looking for updates and saying they were stuck down in the busy ER. Also, he had a message from his wife telling him that Clark was doing well and asking about Greg.

Judging by the messages and the current time, Ed realized he had been asleep for about an hour and a half. He stood, feeling more tired than he had in a long time, and quietly slipped past Dean out of the room in search of coffee.

Even though Ed had made an effort to close the door quietly, the sound of the click and the movement in the room roused Spike from his light sleep. He had never been a heavy sleeper and was a little surprised at himself for sleeping as long as he had with that many people in the room. He pulled his watch up and checked it, seeing that what his body was telling him was right, he had spent too long in the chair. Groaning and stretching his neck and back, Spike sat forward and ran his hands over his face and into his hair a few times. He leaned forward with his elbows on his knees, his fingertips brushing the plastic edge of the bed that Parker lay in. He was listening to the machines and absently drumming to the beat while thinking about what was going to be next. After a few seconds he lost the beat, realizing he was no longer with the machines. Still focusing on his thoughts, Spike adjusted his tapping. Within a few seconds, it happened again. He realized that it wasn't him that was changing the time, it was what he was keeping time to that wasn't consistent. He looked into Sarge's face noticing a light layer of sweat there. "Boss?" Spike whispered, not wanting to wake the others. He put his hand over his forehead, feeling heat radiating. "Okay, Boss, what's up?" Spike looked at the monitors trying to see if he was going to need to get help. Before he had a chance to make a decision, though, one was made for him. Suddenly, Parker's body jerked and the machines hooked to him started to make new noises, beeping much faster. "No, Boss." Spike pled quietly before speaking loudly, "Guys, we need some help!" From across the bed, Spike saw Dean jerk awake at the sound of his panicked voice. He heard Leah jump to consciousnesses behind him, "What's going on Spike?" She asked, voice hoarse from sleep. "I don't know, get a doctor!" Spike brought his other hand down and grabbed onto Parker's twitching arm while he also still held his forehead. The monitors were beeping and buzzing and Spike started to feel Parker spasm under his hands. Dean had jumped out of his chair and gone toward the door, but it was already opening from the other side, the staff had received an alert at the nurses' station and come down to investigate.

Spike looked to the door and when he saw doctors entering yelled for help, fear back in his voice. "You have to help him." Spike urged, now trying to hold down Parker while he shook.

"Looks like he's seizing." A young, curly haired nurse in pink scrubs said crossing over to the bed. She was followed quickly by a much older as well as a middle aged male nurse. "Page Doctor Linden and grab Doctor Matthews next door." The male nurse turned around and headed back out into the hall following instructions. The first two nurses started working on Greg and within seconds the doctor had arrived followed by the third nurse who had gone to get him. Seeing the patient, the doctor swept in and started giving instructions to the nurses. Spike stepped back but watched as Parker continued to jump at consistent intervals. "You have to do something." Spike plead, panicking as what seemed like every machine hooked to Parker screamed. The older nurse turned around and reassured him, "We're going to help him, don't worry." Leah put a hand on Spike's shoulder and pulled him back the two steps that the size of the room allowed.

The nurses and doctor started injecting things into Parker's IV waiting for something to happen while assessing him. One of them pulled open his eye and tried to shine a light in his pupil, but couldn't find it, his eyes having rolled back. Leah, Spike and Dean watched in stunned silence as they attempted to help and do something to help.

Wandering back from getting coffee from a nearby machine, Ed saw commotion at the end of the hall. A nurse came out of Greg's room into the one next door and then came back seconds later with a doctor in tow. Ed picked up speed with his walk and then heard the panicked voice of Spike begging them to do something. "Oh shit, Greg." Ed whispered as he jogged the last few strides to the door, steaming coffee spilling on his hand, throwing what was left of the coffee into the trash at the end of the hall.

"What the hell happened?" He demanded, rounding the corner and seeing the scene inside the room. Spike stood in the corner with Leah's hand on his shoulder, Spike's eyes as big as saucers watching Greg. Two nurses stood in front of them, one with a ventilator bag that was now manually breathing for Greg and the other injecting something into his IV. On the bed, Greg was shaking forcefully and another nurse had released his leg from the elevated position it was in. Dean stood against the wall while a doctor Ed hadn't seen before worked to help Greg out. They were rapidly talking back and forth, giving orders, asking and answering questions.

Dean answered Ed, "Ed, I don't know what happened. Spike woke us up when he started shaking."

Ed moved in next to Dean and put an arm around his shoulder, "Okay, Dean." Ed looked across their sergeant and locked eyes with Spike who stood looking helpless, arms hanging at his side. Ed noticed Leah's hand was creasing the top of his shirt, Ed realized she was actually holding him back.

"Seizing's stopped." One of the nurses noted as Greg's body stilled. The doctor had her stethoscope out and was listening to Greg's chest again, she announced, "Lung collapsed again, could be shrapnel. BP is dropping. Let's move him down to surgery right now." The nurses went to work pulling plugs on monitors and getting the bed moving. They angled it and managed to get it out the door of the tiny room. Ed followed a few paces out the door watching the top of Greg's bald head get further away down the hall towards the doors marked 'Surgery'. He stopped walking and closed his eyes before he took a couple of deep breaths standing alone in the empty hallway. He was starting to feel that panic rise in him again, the same panic he had felt more often recently. He was shocked when he learned a few weeks ago that this feeling actually qualified as a panic attack. His palms were suddenly sweaty and he could feel the perspiration on his forehead as well. Ed tried to calm himself while he watched the door swing and Greg was wheeled out of sight. He ran his hands over his head with a deep sigh and then turned back toward the room.


	20. Chapter 20

He came back around the corner and was surprised to see Leah hugging Spike. Ed knew that this had been a rough day for the young member of this team and that the bond he shared with Greg was special. Ed knew that Spike meant a great deal to Greg, even from the time Spike was brought onto Team One Parker could see that this was a personality he would enjoy working with. Of course, Greg was the more emotive member of the team, but he wasn't overt about it. Ed had heard him say enough small things though to conclude that Greg felt his bond with Spike was strong and he thought of him like a son.

"Spike." Ed crossed the room, his own emotions now starting to bubble to the surface as the tech turned to him, tears in his eyes. Ed reached out and grabbed him by the shoulder, pulling him roughly into a tight hug. Long ago, Greg had made it clear to Eddie that emotion was not a sign of weakness. As a young cop Ed had thought like many others, 'Real men don't cry.' But when he made SRU and started learning more about people's reactions he came to the realization that in fact, real men do cry, especially if the situation warranted it. Some of the most stable men he now knew were not afraid to shed a tear now and then. It was something Ed at times wished he could do more openly. Unfortunately, the stigma still held him back and his tears were usually saved for private times, occasionally around Sophie and more often around Greg. Otherwise, he would be alone when the emotions would overtake him.

Now though, while holding his friend and teammate in his arms, Ed allowed a tear to fall. "It's okay, Spike." Spike held his arms to his body and allowed Ed to hold him close. Leah had turned her attention to Dean, who stood watching Ed and Spike. She put an arm around him and squeezed his shoulder. "Dean, here, sit down." Leah pulled a chair closer to then and guided Dean down. He looked at his hands and took a few breaths to control himself.

Ed pulled away from Spike, wiping his eyes and allowing Spike to do the same. "What happened?" Ed asked cautiously grabbing Spike with one hand on each of his shoulders.

"Well," Spike started, his voice shaky, "I heard you leave and was just sitting there, then the monitors started to beep differently, beep more and then he just started shaking. They didn't really tell us anything except what you heard."

"Okay, Spike, you tell Sam and Jules, I'm going to go see what I can find out. Leah, you stay here with Dean." Ed commanded. Leah smiled in spite of herself, Ed was still Ed, even now. Ed left the room, on the way by he laid a hand on Dean's shoulder. Spike also left the room, marvelling at how spacious it seemed now that the bed was no longer in it. He dialled Sam's cell phone and wasn't surprised when he picked up immediately after the first ring.

"Spike, what's going on?" Sam asked, voice full of worry in lieu of hello.

"Sam, it's Boss, they took him back to surgery." Spike spat with no pre-empt.

"Dammit. What happened?" Sam asked, his voice changing quickly. "Is he going to be okay?"

Spike sighed, "I don't know Sam, Ed's gone to find out the details."

"Weren't you guys there?" Sam asked, anger and accusation in his tone.

"Of course we were, Sam-" Spike started.

"Then why don't you know?" Sam asked.

Spike sighed, "Sam, he had a seizure and they said his lung collapsed again, they took him away so fast we didn't have a chance to find anything out."

Sam seemed to have come down from his anger. Spike knew that it wasn't at him anyway but this was how Sam dealt with things out of his control. "We'll up there in a few minutes, they're just finishing up with Jules." Sam hung up leaving Spike feeling worse than he had before.

He turned and headed back into the room. "How ya doin', Dean?" He asked. "I'm okay." Dean answered, sounding far from it. "You know," Spike said, "It's okay if you're not." Dean half smiled, looking at Spike, "Maybe I'm not, totally, then." Spike nodded, smiling in spite of how he felt. "Well," Spike said lowering himself into his chair again, "We're here for you, Dean, just like we're here for your dad." Dean was already nodding, "I know." He said quietly. "Thanks."

Ed came back in the room, "They won't tell me anything more yet. All I could find out is that they're taking him back down to surgery and they think there's some more shrapnel, possibly an infection and some kind of medication problem that might have caused the seizure." Ed caught himself at the words he was saying. He sighed and absently brought up his right hand, rubbing it with his left. He looked at it without thinking before he really saw it. Dean also noticed, "Ed, what happened to your hand?" He could see red marks and splotches. "Yeah," Ed said, examining it closer, "I spilled some coffee on it on the way back." He paused, "Okay, maybe a lot of coffee." Spike got up and crossed over, grabbing Ed's hand, "Ed, that's a bad burn." He turned it over and looked at the palm side, seeing not much there, but Ed's first finger, thumb and back of his hand held numerous marks. "This came from a coffee? How much did you spill?" Ed pulled at his hand to try and get it back from Spike but he wasn't going to let it go. "Spike, it's fine." Ed insisted, "I had just got it when I heard you and I wasn't really paying attention." Spike let go but warned, "Keep an eye on that, Ed." He nodded impatiently, "I will, Spike, I will." He looked around and said, "They said we can stay here, they're going to bring Greg back here when they're finished in surgery."Ed couldn't help but notice the brewing feeling in the pit of his stomach, hoping that he came back from surgery at all.


	21. Chapter 21

Minutes later Sam and Jules arrived and Ed explained the updated situation. Jules had been given a crutch to help her stay off her leg and Ed stood and gave her the chair that he had been sitting in. Sam slid down the wall and sat on the floor next to Jules' chair while Ed paced and the others used the few chairs available. Dean took up charge of the remote control and found a news channel. They all watched extensive coverage on the previous day as well as a really quite nice segment on Parker that concluded with the story of him being brought into the ER. They had interviewed a civilian who was there and described the scene. Information was obviously available and the report about Parker and Team One ended with a team favourite photo of the team from the Metro Police magazine. They called them heroes of the day and credited them for saving thousands of lives. The team members looked around at each other hearing the words. The word 'hero' settled over the room.

"You guys are, you know." Dean said looking around, meeting each team members eyes. "It was all because of you that things worked out as well as they did. I know not everything went the way you wanted," His eyes slipped to where his father had laid, "but you guys really did save a lot of lives yesterday." He continued to look around at the team, "My Dad," Dean started, before pausing and clearing his throat, "My Dad is so proud of you guys, you should hear the way he talks about you. He loves you guys and I know that you guys, Team One, saved more lives than anyone else could have." Dean looked down and then back, "I'm proud of all of you too, if that makes a difference." Dean finished quietly.

Ed put his hands on his hips and looked at his team, and then Dean who seemed to feel awkward about his confession, "Dean," Ed paused, "Your Dad is the best cop and the best man I've ever known. We're all proud to get to work with him. I know that your Dad is proud of you too." He put a hand again on Dean's shoulder and squeezed.

A nurse entered and looked around the room seeing the team not needing to ask if they were there for Sergeant Parker. "I just wanted to update you that they've stabilized him in surgery and they're working on re-inflating his lung." Spike spoke up, wide eyed again, "What caused the seizure?" The nurse explained that it was part of a reaction with a medication he was receiving, combined with his fever and possibly even lack of oxygen to his brain when he was injured, "It shouldn't happen again, though." She assured the team. "He'll be a couple of hours in surgery yet." She turned and left.

Ed looked around at the team, Sam, Jules, Leah and Spike all in their SRU uniforms still. "You guys should go and clean up. Shower and change. I'll stay here and wait and let you guys know if anything changes." Spike started shaking his head immediately, Ed wasn't really surprised that he was going to be stubborn about this. "You heard her, guys. He's gonna be in surgery for a couple of hours. We can't do anything here." Ed urged.

Surprisingly to Ed, Sam was the first one to stand up, "You know, I think I could do with a shower, and Jules, you could use some rest." Ed realized then that this wasn't for his benefit, but for his wife's. "We also should check in on our family, get them on a plane home." Jules turned around to her new husband and was about to protest, but then agreed, "I guess we probably have to, don't we?" She asked rhetorically. "It doesn't look like we'll be back to normal any time soon, and your Dad's going to have to get home." Sam looked down at his watch, "Um, I think they already left." Ed looked over with raised eyebrows, "What without saying goodbye?" Sam sighed, "Well, the Colonel was never one for much emotion."

Jules looked at Sam, "My parents are still here." Sam smiled as he played up a groan with an eyeroll, "The inlaws." Jules gave him a playful backhanded whack around the mid-section. She started to pull herself up and Sam reached down to help her, Ed grabbed the crutch and passed it across.

"We're not gonna be long." Jules said, a hint of regret in her voice. Ed nodded, "It's okay, it's okay to leave. There's nothing you can do here. You'll probably be back before he is." Jules looked around at the remaining members of the team, she hobbled over and hugged Spike, whispering, "Great work today, Spike." She pulled back and Spike smiled, unable to answer. She moved to Leah and then Dean. "Your Dad will pull through." Dean thanked her and finally she moved to Ed. "Ed, I'm so glad you were there for Sarge, that you were there to help him." Ed looked at her and nodded. Sam had circled behind Jules, giving quick and quiet hugs to the team and Dean. Heading toward the door, Jules paused, "See you guys soon." Sam finished, "Keep us informed."

Ed answered, "You bet." He paused when Sam didn't move, "Go, it's okay." Ed gave Sam a little push which started him out the door. Ed stepped out and watched them walk, Sam reaching down and taking Jules' hand while the other worked the crutch. Ed headed back into the slowly emptying room.

"Spike, Leah?" He asked, "You guys should go clean up to." Ed looked at them both.

"When Sam and Jules get back, I might go. We'll see." Leah told him. Spike, however, shook his head. "I'll stay."

Ed argued quietly, "Spike, you can't stay here forever. You have to go and change, get some sleep eventually." Spike looked up from the ground, "I'll go after you do, Ed." Spike said defiantly, looking at his team leader and knowing damn well that he wasn't going to go anywhere. "Spike." Ed said softly, sighing. "Don't bother, Ed." Spike said, shaking his head, "Not going." Ed knew that part of Spike, although quiet and humorous, could also be stubborn beyond logic.

Ed sat back down and settled in, returning texts and answering emails and trying not to think about the day he had just lived through. He knew that he would have to face it all eventually, every emotion, every tear, every tragic death, but he just wasn't quite ready yet. Dean watched the television in the room and the others entertained themselves saying little as the day wore on into the afternoon. Dean began to get restless, adjusting his position repeatedly before finally saying, "Anyone else hungry?" Ed, who had been leaning back with his eyes closed, turned to Dean and agreed. As Dean stood and stretched he asked, "I wonder what's taking so long? Ed, do you think everything's okay?" Ed checked his watch and realized that it had been almost 5 hours since they'd taken Greg back to surgery. He pulled himself out of his own chair and told him, "I'll go check."

Ed left the room and went to the nurses' station that he had visited a few times already. His stomach rumbled unpleasantly as he crossed the floor. He noticed that the staff had changed and he approached a short, brown-haired nurse who was manning the desk. She didn't look up right away, but when she did Ed saw she looked alert and friendly, he smiled back at her. "Hi there, I'm looking for an update on my Sergeant, Greg Parker?" She started typing immediately while Ed continued, "They took him back to surgery a while ago and I…" Ed stopped talking when he saw her bright eyes dim with concern. She noticed Ed stop talking and met his eyes.

"It looks like Mr. Parker is having a tough time in surgery." She told Ed who put his palms on the desk to steady himself, "What's happened?" He asked breathlessly.

"They're having some trouble keeping him stable, the live notes show more shrapnel than they thought as well as bone fragments in his bloodstream." Ed watched her eyes move quickly as she read over the file on the screen in front of her. Finally, Ed leaned over to see what she was seeing. He was surprised to see the doctors on the screen moving, it was a live feed from the OR where they had Greg. "Oh my god." Ed whispered, "What are they doing?" The medical team around the person on the table was scurrying around urgently, "He's crashing, look, you really shouldn't be watching this." She reached up to turn the monitor away but Ed was quicker, reaching out to the screen, "No, wait. He's my friend, you can't." She looked at the man in front of her and let it go, his green-blue eyes were set on the images on the screen, sadness and fear ingrained deep into the lines on his face.

Ed watched them eagerly while one doctor was working the suction on Greg's torso. He turned around partially to pick up some gauze and Ed could see that they had opened a wide section of his friend's chest. He sighed when he could see a few of Greg's internal organs, including his damaged lung. Even though the image was grainy, Ed could see the bright red spots where it had been repaired. The others working were injecting needles into his IV, one of them changed one of the hanging bags and another doctor was working lower down on Greg's torso. He pulled the end of a pair of tweezers out of his abdomen and yet another nurse stepped forward as he dropped something into the tray. Next to the video feed, the vital numbers were displayed. They slowly started to change and the one next to the little picture of the heart slowed back down. Ed leaned closer putting his elbows on the counter and leaning his chin on his hands. He felt sick watching how hard they had to work to keep Greg alive. "I think they've got him stable again." The nurse said quietly after the urgency subsided. Ed backed up and closed his eyes. "Do you know how much longer it's going to be?" Before he'd even finished his question, the nurse was shaking her head no. "It seems like they keep finding more shrapnel, it can be very intricate and time-consuming work." Ed glanced back to the monitor and started rambling, "Okay, I get it. Thanks." He turned away from her, swallowing hard and trying to erase the newly ingrained images from his mind.

He was no longer hungry; all he could think about was what he'd seen on the screen. He felt sick and as he slowly walked back to the others it really started to sink into him how much they weren't out of the woods yet. The process of Greg getting better was going to take a long time. They were going to spend a long time in this hospital, and that was if things went well. He turned the corner into the room without thinking, Spike immediately looked up at him, "Ed, what is it?" It didn't take much for Spike to read the look on Ed's face, the ashen colour of his face and the sadness around his eyes told him he had just received bad news. Ed looked up and met Spikes eyes. He always admired how Spike looked so young, especially when he was scared. The way his eyes widened coupled with his young haircut and his stature made him look like a scared kid when he was worried. Ed took a sweeping glance around the room and then told Spike, "He's just, he's just still in surgery." Ed breathed out heavily, "They're working on it, but it shouldn't be too much longer." Ed tried to believe his words, but he couldn't quite deliver them with the certainty that he should have. Spike knew there was more to be said, but Ed didn't give him a chance. "Dean, you wanna to go down to the café and grab a bite? I'll take ya. There's one on the ground floor." Dean shrugged, "Sure." Ed turned back to Leah and Spike, "You guys coming?" Leah stood preparing to go with them, Spike, however, stayed where he was. "I'm good." He told them. Ed glanced at him and Spike explained, "Just in case he comes back, I'll wait. Bring me a coffee though." Leah agreed and the three of them let Spike alone in the empty room.


	22. Chapter 22

Spike spent the time pacing the room while the others went downstairs to the café. Within half an hour they'd returned bringing Spike a coffee and a sandwich. He thanked them as they settled back in.

Not long after they got back, they heard movement in the hallway and the door opened, Greg had returned. He seemed to have more machines than he had before attached to him, the nurses set him back up in the room and one of the doctors that Ed had seen asked to speak to Ed outside. Spike also sprung up to join him while Dean moved to see Greg closer up.

This doctor was a younger man for a surgeon, in his mid-thirties with sandy blonde hair and he was built like he could have been a police officer in another life. He was still in his scrubs and he introduced himself to them as Dr. Morris. Spike and Ed stood with their backs to the door watching the tired doctor gather this thoughts before he started to speak. "Mr. Parker had a very eventful surgery. We had to work hard to bring him back a few times but he pulled through and became relatively stable towards the end of his surgery. We think we've got most of the shrapnel and bone fragments out, we hope that there are no more major pieces, but there's still a danger of embolism. We unblocked a few during the surgery and that may be what caused the seizure before the surgery. We are hopeful that we can remove Mr. Parker from the intubation in the next few hours and also that he will come around. We are going to lower his medications so hopefully he can tell us when he wakes up if there are any injuries we missed." Ed looked at Spike and put his arm around his shoulders noticing that he was swaying on his feet slightly. "I'm not going to lie to you, he's lucky he made it this far. Hopefully now he's turned the corner to improvement." Ed felt Spike give an involuntary shudder under his arms. "We explored nearly his entire abdomen and found more fragments. We're still very worried about infection and also his knee will need at least a few more surgeries. In the mean time, we just need to wait. I understand you are police officers and he's your sergeant. We've made exceptions to the rules governing the number of visitors because these are exceptional circumstances."

"Thank you, Doc." Ed said.

"I will go in and check on him and then I'm off shift. Dr. Linden will be back on very soon and the nurses are constantly monitoring him." He made to move toward the room and Ed and Spike moved to let him get past.

"More surgeries on his knee?" Spike asked warily, his throat dry. Ed nodded, "I know, I caught that too." Ed wanted to focus on just getting through the next few days, he couldn't' even think that far down the road yet. "Are you okay?" Ed asked Spike. "Yeah, Ed. I just felt a little lightheaded, but I'm okay." Ed sized up his friend, "You really should go home and get some sleep, Spike. A real meal." Spike shook his head, "I'm good, Ed. Really." Ed didn't believe Spike, but he couldn't argue with him when he wasn't prepared to leave either. "How's your hand, Ed?" Ed brought it up and had a look at it. It had been throbbing off and on for hours, but he was okay. Looking at it now he noticed a couple of blisters forming. "It'll be alright." He said. Spike tried to get a look at it but Ed was already headed back into the room, passing the doctor on his way out.

He and Spike re-entered the room and both looked to Greg. He was unconscious as expected and Spike sat while Ed stood restlessly paced around the corner of the room. A short time after they settled back in, Ed checked the time finding it was nearly 2 pm. It had been over a day since it all started. He felt his phone buzz yet again, it felt like it had been going non-stop for hours. Every time he looked at it the little red light was flashing. He picked it up again seeing a message from Wordy wanting to know when was a good time to come by. Ed smiled that Wordy knew the score as well as any of the team members. There were no preemptive questions, no extra comments. He knew Ed would be there with Parker.

Ed answered his friend and as soon as the message sent he was distracted by sounds in the hallway of ruffling plastic bags. He looked up to Jules coming around the corner with 2 grocery bags in one hand and her crutch in the other, an over sized purse slung around her shoulder. Right behind her was Sam, also loaded down with plastic bags. They both had showered and changed. Jules looked to have slept while Sam still held bags under his eyes almost the size of the ones in his hand. The smell filled the room, Chinese food. "Hey guys." Spike said, corners of his mouth turning up to a smile. "Smells good." He stood and crossed the room, around the foot of Parker's bed. Jules and Sam looked over the boss, "How'd the surgery go?" Jules asked. Ed answered, "He just got back a while ago. They're hoping he's going to wake up soon." Sam asked, "Should we be all in here?" Spike answered this time while rifling through the bags searching through the food, "The doc said we could all be here, they're gonna make an exception to the rules for us." The room was crowded now with the entire team in it along with Dean. It was already smaller than the average room with just enough room for the one bed, with four chairs added and six people inside plus the patient, it was very tight. The team used every surface available to spread out the containers and passed around paper plates. Ed had taken Dean and Leah downstairs, but he'd only purchased a bagel, throwing most of it in the garbage when the others weren't looking. Ed still wasn't hungry but Dean was a teenage boy, he was happy to take some more food and Leah even grabbed a plate. They got comfortable, Sam and Spike taking up spots on the floor and chatted lightly while eating. No one felt terribly at home there, but they were a team and they made the most of the situation. At least they were together and while they sat and chatted mundanely they each had thoughts of thankfulness that they had made it through the day.

Leah finished up the food she took and decided it was time for her to head home and change. Ed eyed Spike but wasn't surprised when he didn't jump up to go home. "Dean, are you okay? Need anything?" Leah asked kindly. "No, thanks." Dean answered. She swept around the room and headed out the door. "Call me if anything changes or if you need anything." She slipped out and was gone leaving the team and Dean with the rest of their food and Parker looking pale but alive.


	23. Chapter 23

The team continued to chat and eat, watching TV and of course, keeping an eye on Parker. For now the avoided the heavier aspects of their recent day and talked about Sam and Jules' wedding, their parents and shared a few laughs about their wedding. The team finally got a chance to chat casually with the new couple about their future addition and there was lots of help offered to work on a nursery. Although the weight of Parker held over them heavily, they were grateful for the presence of each other to help pass the time and keep each other from getting too upset with worry about Greg.

Greg, while lost deep in his medicated state, slowly started to pull forward out of the haze. He heard the voices and the laughter of those he loved. He wasn't awake, but their voices and their happiness pulled him toward them as he dreamed of times in their past when they had all been together. Picnics, parties, evenings at the pub and even on shift when they shared good times, laughter and love. Occasionally the darkness pulled at him, threatened to pull him under, but the voices of his family kept him focused on finding a way back to them. He knew that he needed to move toward them, not away from them.

Once the food was gone, the team was as content as they could be, the door to Greg's room opened and Dr. Linden came in, looking first to Greg but then around the room.

"Well, this is quite the party." He said with a smile. He took in the scene around him, before again fixing his gaze on the injured officer. "I hear he's improved since surgery. Things are getting better." He checked Parker's vitals and again took in the team. "I guess I'm going to be seeing a lot of you guys, and you must be his son." Dean stood, shook the doctors' hand and introduced himself. Sam introduced himself as well and Jules took the doctors hand saying, "Jules Callahagn, er, Braddock." She smiled. The doctor's eyes flicked to Sam and then back to Jules. "Recently married?" Dr. Linden asked, "Yesterday." Sam answered. "Yesterday," The doctor echoed, "Wow. Congratulations." Jules smiled, "Thanks." Ed explained that Leah just left and the doctor remembered Ed's name from the day before. He turned to Spike but before he could speak, he was already correcting him, "Call me Spike." The doctor raised his eyebrows, "Spike. Okay, sure. Well," Linden addressed the room, "I'm hoping your sergeant will continue to improve over the next hours. He had them worried in surgery but we are looking ahead now to better things. We're going to keep him here and keep a close watch on him. You guys are fine here but when he wakes up we might have to find somewhere else for some of you to be." The team was nodding obediently, those that had thought ahead expected this. Ed spoke for the team, "We'll do whatever you want, whatever's best for the boss." The doctor smiled around at them and left the room.

The team was left again, flipping through the TV channels and waiting. More hours passed as they went in and out running different errands and getting food, drinks and washroom breaks. The sun set and it started to get dark again, Leah returned with coffee and the team waited and watched.

Into the night, Dean led the charge to go back down to the café and get some near midnight dinner. Leah again agreed to accompany him and Sam and Jules were walking the floor trying to keep Jules' leg in motion. She had been told to stay off it for long periods, but keep it moving at intervals. They went in and out in waves, always warning those remaining to update them, even though they were never going far. The group had filtered out and Ed found himself alone with Spike. Ed took the opportunity to move over and sit in the chair next to Spike, who watched him curiously. "Ed," Spike started, "I know," trying to pre-empt what he knew was coming. Ed cut him off, "Spike you haven't left this room in days."

"That's not true." Spike said, "I went to the washroom." He smiled up at Ed, half looking at him. Ed sighed, "Spike, you're still in your uniform."

"Ed, I know. I just want to, I just wanna be here when he wakes up." He motioned toward Parker. "I will go home for a while, after he's up, but," Spike looked up at Ed, "Only if you do." Ed smiled at Spike, "Okay, Spike. I'll go check on Clark too, but not until the boss wakes up."

Greg had been wavering in and out of consciousness and picking up small parts of conversations. He kept hearing his team, the TV and also his son. He wasn't aware enough to react, but he floated below the surface of being awake and then would fall off into the recesses of darkness again. This time, he heard Eddie and pulled himself forward enough to focus on his voice. As he slowly pulled toward consciousness this time items flew by him. Feelings, thoughts and pain coursed over him, he realized he must be waking up. The feeling that was in his chest caused him to choke, he couldn't breathe, but he was still getting oxygen because he was alive. What was going on? He jerked awake and groaned in his throat, hands reaching up to find out what was there. Suddenly, there were strong hands holding him down, holding onto his arms. He had to get free, he had to breathe.

Ed had just made the agreement with Spike when he heard the monitors change. The steady beeping increased and he looked past Spike to Greg on the bed. He saw a change in the way he lay, his shoulder twitched and his face showed pain instead of the peace it had shown before. Greg's eyes blinked open for a second and then closed again. Spike followed Ed's gaze and turned in time to hear Greg groan and then start to panic. Ed took three steps around the bed and grabbed a hold of Parker's hand, holding it down before it could do any damage. "Boss?" Spike asked, softly, trying to bring him back quietly. Ed knew that Parker was weak and it was evidenced further by how little he was able to fight his friend. Spike saw his other hand moving and grabbed on to stop him from pulling out his IV's. "Greg." Ed called, "Greg, I'm here, we're here. Can you hear us?" He tried to keep his voice even to try and keep Greg calm, but he didn't think he was successful. Greg's eyes shot open, unfocused and searching, looking in all directions but not actually seeing. He grunted again and fought both Ed and Spike to get a hand on the thing in his throat, on what was stopping him from taking a breath. "Greg, buddy, Greg." Ed leaned over his head trying to get him to focus. "Greg, I'm right here buddy, just calm down, keep it cool, okay. We're here." It felt like minutes, but Ed knew it was only a matter of seconds before Ed felt Greg stop fighting. Finally he met his eyes and Ed saw fear and pain there. Spike spoke up from across the bed from Ed, "Boss, hey." He too caught the pain in Greg's eyes which caused his own heart to feel pain in response. Spike knew his eyes would show his concern and that he'd be able to read him, but he didn't care. At the sound of his voice, Greg turned his fearful gaze to Spike who had let his grip go. Greg took the opportunity to slip his hand out from under Spike's and grab onto his uniform sleeve. Spike brought his other hand up and grabbed onto the back of Greg's hand. Spike nodded with a small smile, "Welcome back, Boss."


End file.
